The disfigured tree shakes her arthritic limbs,
Dying petals released from their midget stems.
They flutter down, carried by a motherly wind.
Upon the wooden casket these petals fall,
A cherry blossom shower that wraps the coffin as a shawl.
Some stay in the air, dancing a lonely step,
Until their partner lets them drop like the rest,
Impaled by frail blades of emerald, embracing death.
Across sacred graves are they carefully strewn,
Their dying breaths expressed upon ghostly tombs.
To the summer they bestow their final scent,
One of bittersweet seasons that have came and went,
Of tender times that have long since been spent.
And so their faint memory shall live,
A fading reminder of all that has been.
Author notes
The dying flower petals are supposed to be a metaphor for dying life that's why they fell on a casket! ;-;
Honest opinion please!
Purple!
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Fantastic imagery
The picture that is painted here is so vivid
Alongside that, you have some good emotional content
Great poem
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upon the wooden casket these petals fall, a cherry blossom shower that wrapps the coffin as a shawl
What can I say this is brilliant, the words the rhyme just a masterpiece,
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Neph-
In each poem I see of yours I always think to myself; How does she do that? with every word said it seems to have a vault of meaning behind it, a captivating tale that says more than can be seen.
Furthermore, I adore this poem. Keep writing, dear! go on!
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I for one can justify the powerfullness scent has on triggering memories. Whenever i get even the faintest whiff of freshly mowed grass I remember sitting out on the front lawn of my grandparent's house watching my grandfather mow the lawn. And I think, I always will remember that whenever I smell freshly mowed grass.
Your poems always astound me Elizabeth for one so young, (yes you're still 13 damnit-.-), you show such mastery of the english language in each and every poem you pen. You truly astound me. You my friend, are going places.
Omnia Vincit Amor,
Justin
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Rhyming usually bothers me, but I really liked your poem. The flow is great and the words fit so well together.
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nice poem.
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The last line should be:
A fading reminder of all that has been.
Change reminded to reminder. Other than that, I like this very much.
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