Mother, Father and Brother,
Are removed from my life.
I am my own person now,
They cannot control me.
One step too far,
Their boundaries they overstepped.
Had they not butted in,
Discord would not have commenced.
Sheltered, controlled and watched,
Never allowed to be Kyle.
Beliefs were always forced,
Decision was never allowed.
I am alone now,
Family is no longer needed.
I can finally be my true self,
Whom I've so longed to become.
A contest entry
- Your Choice... by my02U.
550 points, ended November 16, 2008, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - I'm alone......are you? by movedon.
700 points, ended November 25, 2008, 103 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Brotherly/Sisterly Love by Crazy9Piano8Freak.
600 points, ended December 15, 2008, 57 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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It's a sad poem but I like it. Great job. But you might want to change the background to something more exciting. Anway wonderful write and thanks for entering!
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The thing that gets me is why people feel they need to be someone else other that their true innerself... sad poem, well wrote, thank you for sharing,
Selfexpressive.
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this is such a sad poem, it reminds me a little of an old friend, which makes me really sad, great poem, best of luck in the contest
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the last two lines of the second stanza are a little hard to take in - one is very casual, the other more serious because of the word choicee. work on keeping the tone the same throughout the piece, but other than that great job. the trouble with poetry is that it makes you so curious but you don't want to pry in case it was a real-life experience of the author. *sigh* oh well, i'll live.
good job and good luck in the contests!
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I wonder what beliefs were forced. nice job
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wow you need another hug don't ya?!
This is so terribely saddening!! I have 14 siblings. And my parents, long story, shipped all but 5 off to Chicago to live my aunt. My parents control me..more than you'd ever know. And it sucks and I hate it with a firey passion. Such a deep write!
ing alone,
Mylee -
Well expressed write consistent in thought
short and to the point
Nicely done
Thank you for sharing
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nice-ly done about the family appeal that you are removing them from the life that you want to start as a child grwoing into a man you go boy
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really good
somtimes that's exactly how I feel
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alot of ppl will be able 2 relate to this. many teenagers struggaling to fidn there own way there own path in life trying to brake free from there parents.
Nice one kyle =]
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Killer poem!I feel one with people that are or have beem tortured rebel souls like you and me!We long for acceptance but are denied "unless"...but a parents' love is supposed to be unconditional...not under certain terms and conditions!Love how you get your message across in such a blunt and honest way!It's heartfelt so one can tell the harm they've caused you in your life by asking you to be something you are not.I personally PROUD that another one of my rebel bretheren has made it out of the darkness they threw you into and come into yourself to live and to love your own life!Thanks for posting this for all us rebels!-Rock On
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