the email.

its okay, dont be sorry.

well if we're saying sorry for things;
im sorry that ive had a few fags,
im sorry im such an angry person,
im sorry that i poured water over you,
im sorry if i flirt with anyone,
im sorry i get jealous and never tell you,
im sorry i hit yu,
im sorry i made you hurt yurself,
im sorry if i go off with people instead of yu,
im sorry i dont try hard enough,
im sorry i talk too much,
im sorry i push yu away,
im sorry i dont meet your expectations,
im sorry i cut myself,
im sorry for being pissed off for no apparant reasons,
im sorry i sometimes think of him,
im sorry if i make you feel shit,
im sorry for being me i guess.

i dont really know why yu even like me,
tbh
if i were yu i wud have used me and pissed off by now,
but i know your  not like that and i dont deserevyou one single bit,
but i do need you,
i do miss you,
i do think alot about you,
i do wish i was with you,
i do love being with you,
i do apreciate you,
i do cry for you,
i do laugh with you,
i do luv you.

im also sorry i dont show it.
and im sorry i cant meet yur standards.


and i dno.
but thats hu i am
i cry
i giggle
i get very angry
i smoke
i drinik
i swear
i have massive modd swings
i love cuddles
i like food, i just hate eating,
i am jealous
i am paranoid sometimes
i am selfish
i flirt
i am clever
i am caring
i do try
i just dont try hard enough.
some of those things i dont want tu be, but i am,ok.

and  i said you couldnt handle me,
but you can,
most of the time,
and that in itself is icredible.
but i think you deserve more than me
and
i dont want to,
AT ALL,
but maybe you shud find someone that makes you feel the way yu make me feel,
bcus its amazing.
maybe yuve already met her, i dontno.
just
the balls in yur court,

haha and everything i just wrote goes against everything i belive in,
letting your guard down,
letting the guy have control,
letting him think yur a push over,
but there you go
i hope you realise this disregard of my morals shows how much i actually like you.

i dont m ind you dont love me,
i KNOW you dont,
its fine,

and i love it when i walk off and you pull me back.
i feel worth something,
when im with yu.



I love yu ,