The slow beat of a drum replays as the death notes in Crime and Punishment
called for the first time in a meeting between life and death, once a mighty
lion, now roadkill for the homeless.
As a slow withered, once beautiful matron of a once happy little boy, now
drinking those drinks of death and slow suicide, calls out for her cat, her
other child. As tires screech in the driveway, withered hands reach out for
the doorknob, time slows to that second of a moment you feel something is wrong,
out of place, and rapid heartbeats that could be mistaken for a heart attack all take
place here in this weary haunted memory frozen in time.
Hearing the evil drunk laughter of that once happy little boy, the matron looks on
in horror, shocked to her senses, finding herself unable to move as she slips
on blood left over from that roadkill she once called her child, the mighty lion in a
jungle that was once territory and home to, now roadkill...
Scenes from a flashback of a crime that only Charles Manson could have loved
pours out in a photograph where everything was just black and white except
splashes of red, not paint red, but a thick clotted bundle of red...
and just a withered matron in that frozen time of a photograph looks on and cries to the pouring rain, pouring out her hate of that once happy little boy now drinking his choice of poisions.
That withered matron now spitefull of her son's neglects of being a man starts to think about a double barrel shotgun in his face.
He got his time in the time of Growing Up by Russel Baker.
Author notes
Just so you know you gave me the prompt:
Faye Dupont, 93, in 1983 illinois, cat gets ran over in the driveway by her drunk son, Donny 22.
At the end where I mention Growing Up by Russel Baker I looked up on yahoo that time and place and couldn't get anything so I looked up prize winning books to describe the date but I dont describe it till the end.
Just thought I would let you know since I dont know if you know the book or not, I dont I just thought it was a creative way of saying the time.
.....and I love cats so I had to have a sense of justice in a way...
A contest entry
- a little fun with characterisation by aeolia.
500 points, ended January 5, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
-
great work was a pleasure to read. you have alot of talent when it comes to putting words together im sure as time goes on i will walk into a bookstore and read your masterpieces. just want to say you have alot of talent.
-
-
Hey thank you, you just made my day!
I was really surprised when I got your comment.
Thanks
-
-
the point was to write from faye's point of view, but still, the prose is pretty good and i like it so i don't care that you did this. you got her character across ('withered matron' was good) regardless, and that was the point of the contest. good work.
i like the idea of the cat being a mighty lion, ravaged and left for the homeless by the cruel... might of the car? lol. you used it in the first and third paragraphs, though, so it did feel a little repetitive.
hope you had fun with this! thanks for the entry!
-
X3
This is amazing.
The allusion between a mighty lion and roadkill for the homeless, all whilst talking about a cat that was ran over by a lady's drunk son...
T'was brill.
=]
-
-
Thanks for the comment on A Photo Left Undug, haha you know after typing that out I now realize that undug is not a word... oh my...
anyways i spent a fair amount of time on this since it was my second prose piece.
Thank you.
-
-
I fail literary terminology wise x.x
-
-
-
Faye Dupont, 93, finds out that her grandson Donny, 22, ran over her favourite cat last night while drunk; a blood-and-cat-smeared driveway, Illinois, USA, 1983
Adding your comment:
1 - 7 of 7
