The Lau lay languishing beneath
the blue pot where the monks would bathe;
they spied her on the rocks one day
and to their ears her song bequeathed
a summer's day, a simpler way.
Now, Lau, they pled, please go away -
your hands are webbed, exceedingly
enticing, white and petal soft
as wild poppies; you may be
a supernatural entity.
Author notes
Lau was a water nymph; the blue pot is the translation of the name for the small lake where she lived.
A contest entry
- Pick a word - Write a Poem in 10 LINES or less (A) by The Fun House.
1050 points, ended November 28, 2008, 44 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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The Lau is my favorite water-maiden of all time. I would keep this short and sweet though. Maybe an intro and ending stanza and one each fore each of the tribulations she endures before each climatic laugh. You should also try and english version of the Blaubeuren Rhyme.
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Beautiful write and flow is perfect, Congratulations on the gold. Well deserved! This indeed was a very interesting contest and you did well.
Love and light,
Lencio
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Oh this is just beautiful ea
The gold is very well deserved. This is so creative and has a lovely lyrical flow to it!
Yes I would love to read more too
It's almost as if you were just getting into this tale.
A wonderful write
Gaylene
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Thank you so much, I am so surprised and inspired that I want to work on a longer version of this now.
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Yes Do it Do it!!!
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oh please continue
I want to read more,
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I love it when a poem tells a story and does it well. This is just so very beautifully done. Great imagery and it is just lovely read aloud.
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Nice work here
Oh what a muse you have come up with in this write . Loved it
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