Burned To Black (November.4.2008)
I'm not the same person you used to know
Something died inside me long ago
I'm afraid you can see right through me
Right through me
And my emptiness shows
My emptiness shows
Burned to black
I have nothing left to give
The ashes of my heart
Have no life left to live
Whatever love had begun
Has been burnt by the sun
And I hate to give all my secrets away
But I won't hide, I won't be ashamed
Because even if you still wanted to love me
Wanted to love me
We would go up in flames
Go up in flames
Burned to black
I have nothing left to give
The ashes of my heart
Have no life left to live
Whatever love had begun
Has been burnt by the sun
Burned to black
I have nothing left to give
The ashes of my heart
Have no life left to live
Whatever love had begun
Has been burnt by the sun
© Amanda Emlay 2008 (All Rights Reserved)
Author notes
I'm not sure if I should add a bridge to this.
Does it feel complete to you?
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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Everything about this write is just excellent, but for me...it was that second verse that really stole the show. I absolutely LOVE the "go up in flames" thought you added in there. It tied in perfectly with your chorus but stands strongly on its own, as well. Beautiful job!
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Thank you Val
I alllllways have issues with the second verse, so I'm glad I did good on this one haha!
I got that one by getting rhyming words with the word "away".. that's how I construced that verse lol.. so random, but I fit it together nicely I think
*hugs* M
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An excellent write, if you were to adda bridge to it perhaps between the last two stanzas, a how or why the change in what you were to what you are. I have a great deal of difficulty with bridges.
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For some reason, I just felt that the piece was done, and it said everything, that's why I asked about the bridge. But yes, you're right, perhaps there is more I can get out of this with a small bridge, explaining what you pointed out! Good call - and THANKS! I might even revise this if I can come up with anything.
How come you have difficulty with bridges??
*hugs* M
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wow
this is amazingly well written ^-^ it's so full of feeling - and while I usually don't like repeating lines and stuff, when you do it here it just makes it so... powerful.
Kudos girlie
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Thank you so so much for such positive words on my piece. I like to put repeating lines when it needs to be done, and I felt that the feelings needed to be reiterated.
Thanks miss chaos!
M
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