Ah, my love come dream with me
and share a kiss on bended knee
before the tinkling silver sighs
of waterfalls and moonlit skies.
A place where passions breathe anew
the fires of want so swift and true
before the tinkling silver sighs
of waterfalls and moonlit skies.
We’ll feel the press of ivy’s touch
against our naked skin and such
before the tinkling silver sighs
of waterfalls and moonlit skies.
This haven I will share with you
upon the shoreline’s purple hue
before the tinkling silver sighs
of waterfalls and moonlit skies.
In a list
A contest entry
- Time to Go by Tercil.
500 points, ended November 4, 2008, 11 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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Romance is what you make of it and the most ordinary scenarios can become silver sighs, waterfalls and moonlit skies if we wish them to be. I remember a long ago scene, just a simple one and yet in my memory that moment has colors and scenery that simply didn't really exists, such is that desire for cherished memories.
Anyway, that is the feeling I get from your poem, and I guess that is poetry, recreating those memories...or creating ones we wish to happen.
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Hiya Yem
It is, isn't it - in the eye of the beholder.
Thanks so much for stopping in today to read my scribbles and for leaving your wonderful thoughts behind, I truly appreciate it
many blessings, Sandi
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This is almost death like, and although leaving is far from this feeling, it may as well be, sadly, a demise here, which I have many feelings lately,
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Deathlike? oh Tony it was a love poem - I lapsed my gold membership so I couldn't put the picture up with it ((((((hugs))))))))
now I feel sad it made you feel that way, I'm so sorry
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Sandi It may well be that i have a weird take on poetry but i loved the line "against our naked skin and such" it tickled my fancy You know that i am not impressed by what people thing is the correct way to write are words used.It reads to my mind as one would (or i would) speak in my normal way of conversation
An excellent piece i love the repeated lines carries the who poem along wonderfully well
Good luck in the contest
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Thank you Legend! :)
giggling with your comment, nope you be not weird my friend...although, hmmm define weird?? If you're like me, I live in my own little world, and that's ok they know me there!
My dear friend, Thank you so much for popping in to view my scribbles today, I truly appreciate your time and wonderful fingerprints left in the sands of time
Many blessings dear, Sandi
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"Ah, my love come dream with me
and share a kiss on bended knee
before the tinkling silver sighs
of waterfalls and moonlit skies."
I loved this stanza especially it reminded me of when my husband Jason proposed to me near his favorite waterfall up in the mountains. Your poem is filled with beautiful imagery and emotion. thanks for sharing. hugs Theresa
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Thank you! :)
Hi Theresa,
I so appreciate your time spent reading and your wonderfully gracious thoughts left behind, thank you!
blessings,
Sandi
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sweet images
I like the refrain's "tinkling silver sighs", and the second stanza is a key to receiving what we desire. The clear images make this a sincere and powerful message. The rhyme "and such" strikes me as weak, but there is little choice for that one. The title taken from the refrain works well to introduce the poem. Well done, and good luck!
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Thank you! :)
yep the rhyme is a bit weak there, I do admit it, but I was used it anyway to give a hint of what else might happen without saying as much (my dry humor) If I could figure something better, I definately will chane it.
Thank you my friend for your GREAT review! I truly appreciate your time and wonderful thoughts!
love and blessings
Sandi
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