mindfulness eludes
thoughts invade my peacefulness
interrupting all
count again one two
memories push through unasked
returning to one
try another way
need to slow my racing mind
stand stretch try again
step by step footfall
heel to toe pacing circles
labyrinthine
each breath floats serene
walking meditation’s path
marks the hour passage
heart rate slowing down
note the flight of fallen leaves
mindfulness returns
Author notes
mindfulness
In a list
A contest entry
- Poetry Formed XL - by Bear - by Arkbear.
500 points, ended November 18, 2008, 6 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Death of an Age! by Dark Otter.
700 points, ended November 26, 2008, 15 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
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Once again -sorry- No. Please see my comment to your "What lies in silence"
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Hello
*labyrinthine = 4 sylls..>>>
http://haikuwithteeth.com/index.php
If you can show me where this word counts 5 sylls, I shall not deduct for this word
*note flight of fallen leaves* = 6 sylls....should be 7
I love the way you repeatd your last L, as sayeth your 1st L....nice conclusion ~
Not sure why you did not center-align your write, but no deduction there
Your message is really nice.....I enjoyed the journey which you took me on -
Your Flow transitions from one KU' to the next with ease -
Too many spaces after *pacing* -
Over-all....very nice KU Chain.....good luck and God bless you,
Bear ~
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my boston accent
lab-or-in=the-in that is how I say it in Nova Scotia Bostonian
got me the fallen leaves. tis 6 messed up will fix and the pacing spacing
don't like center align , well really have not figured out how to do it,as I am flunking Myron class who says you should write anything but 5/7/5. -
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No worries....I shall not deduct for your linguistic accent......and a class which says not to write 5-7-5 is of their own pleasure.....a traditional KU' stands at 5-7-5 ~
I think you did a fine job......and center-align is not a requirement.......but if you ever want to in the future.....go to the top of your poem (in edit mode )....and you will see this.>>>
Your poem:
(Check spelling) (Show rich text buttons)
.....click on (Show rich text buttons) .....and your text box will turn to Rich Text & Fonts
Nice job!
Good luck!
Bear ~
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I know the feeling
I never knew the amount of thought we have.
never noticed but when I did I tried so many different ways of just staying present.
I noticed the space seems to be getting bigger with much less effort.
try another way
need to slow my racing mind
stand stretch try again
I so love this
very creative
a pleasure to read
God bless you...
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Hey there I think that this is a nice poem indeed but per rules of the contest holder you are not to use any capital letter so you might want to change that thanks for sharing and be well
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hey there
thank you so much
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A good way to start my morning
Peace and serenity are highly valued commodities. Hold on to them, they are priceless.
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a lovely journey
& now i must comment, i reluctantly pull myself back to reality -
Simply wonderful, a meditation in itself. Your flow and descriptions are simple and powerful. A great read.
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thank you
humbled by your kind response
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Wonderful way to begin the day.
When thoughts into meditation enter
Let them rise and fly with leaves to center
suppressing such is work for brain
allow to leave on meditaions refrain.
Not well written but inspired thought none the less.
I like your poem here.
Buddy
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tis
Tis enough I am told
to let them flow
noting only they exist
but pondering so hard to resist
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