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A Story Told......... Beyond Loss

We're about to tell you a story.
A story of passion, enduring love and heartbreak.

Picture finding you're true love,
This as we all know is extremely rare.
By this, we mean the kind of love in which you would give your life and soul to another without expecting anything in return.
So, imagine finding that someone to love you as you love them in this way,
The euphoria in being held and feeling safer than you ever have before
knowing that you have something special, feeling total bliss.
Every morning, you notice things you've never noticed before
the birds in the trees, the suns rays in your face, your heart beating,
you have everything..........  And then:

Your purest wish comes true, you're having a baby
concieved through the truest love imagineable,
only to find out it doesn't end there.....
You're having twins.
At first, shock followed by excitement and ectasy.
It's a boy and a girl
From here we view the story differently, watch closely with us
as we watch and travel through time with the tales of the true lovers'
and thier twin babies' concieved of true love
however bear with us friend, for this is not a happy tale we tell......

See clearly the parents faces, see the mothers' glow
as the babies thrive within her,
kicking and causing discomfort that can never make her frown.
Picture the fathers' face as he sings them to sleep each night,
singing lullabies, drawing them into a protected, comforting sleep,
watch him smile.
At 23 weeks all is not so well
Mum wakes up, in pain, a pain like no other that fills her with dread
Dad awakes in panic, but quickly realizes he has to be strong.
In the hospital now their told she is in premature labour
too far gone for prevention
Imagine the fear in their faces
they are told she has contracted a life-threating infection
she has to deliver and their babies have less than a 10% chance of surviving
Stay strong as they do, hold out hope as they do,
never giving in, grasp at the faintest glimmer of hope,
pray with them, cry with them.
It's mums' life or her babies
Thay have no choice, they have NO choice.

Mum is induced and having heavy, painful contractions
Dad holds her hand offering all the reassurance he can muster.
Together they begin to push in a drug induced, carnage of pain, fear and confusion
He wipes the sweat from his loves brow,
watches as she pushes herself to the very brink of exhaustion,
at this point he becomes scared,
not just for his babies but for the life of his love, his family.
He watches his love stuggle, sapped, limp on the bed, he despairs
wishes he could bear the pain, his heart tears at the sight before him
he feels hopeless, completely powerless
Just as he is about to intervene,
doctors decide it's no good she has given everything she has to give,
the pain is too much for her to bear, she is taken to theatre.
Watching his love depart, he sees his daughters' hand,
he knows instantly that she is lost.
See him pacing, awaiting the longest trial of his life
his heart and his guts wrench and ache as each second passes
He waits, He waits

The midwife approaches with a bundle in her arms
it is the most amazing, beautiful, present he could ever wish to recieve
It is his daughther, born asleep but in so many ways at large in life
she bears a scowl which makes him laugh and cry at the same time
her personailty shines through even though her soul is departing
He sings her the night-time lullaby he has sang to each night
she is lost through the infection raging in her mothers' body and distress

He recieves news that his son is alive,
he fills with euphoria however marred with a sadness borne of his loss
Still he awaits his loves return, he visits his son
his beautiful baby boy is thriving
he feels increasing anxious about how his love is,
overwhelmbed by the life of his son
When his love returns 

Early next morning they are roused
Their son is struggling to survive, he has to be ressusitated, he is suffering
unwilling to lose him too,
they continue in their steadfast hope that he will pull through
It is a feeble battle, love alone cannot keep their son alive
They watch as his little tiny heart fights to keep on beating
weep as its' beat slows, he isn't strong enough
he dies in his mothers' arms to the sound of his fathers' faithful lullaby
joining his sister once again

The time comes to lay their children to rest
Picture a white coffin where they both lay side by side once again
See as their father crumbles carrying them to their final resting place
It is a bitter sweet ceremony
the worst kind of goodbye

Ten weeks have passed
tears so fierce they rack the body, grief so raw it tears them apart
bitterness, jealousy, defeatism, rage, anger,
sorrow and all encompassing pain take hold and strenghtens its' grip,
the day bekons where the parents find out their fate
there is a possibility they will not have children again
there may be too much damage
dreams seem so far away out of reach

Then the day of reckoning comes
as they sit there shaking with fear and trepidition
a ray of sunlight beams so bright in their hearts
they recieve the news that they can give babies Mia & Dylan
a brother or sister for them to watch over
this is a second chance of that dream which they will always be thankful for

To Be Continued......................

Author notes

This is the story of my fiance and I and the trials we have endured in the last year.
We wrote this firstly to share with you our understanding of the fear and pain that you are experiencing at the moment and to let you know that whatever life can throw at you, hope will always find a way for those who truely believe it. We pray that you can take that hope from our lives struggles to give you the strength that we know that you are going to need to be there for your partner in the recent future. Our thoughts and prayers are with you both.

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 13 of 13

  • MysteriousWhisper
    June 4
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    beautiful. excellent job. very good write. good luck in the contest!


  • poetry is soul
    May 25

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    omg. this is so sad, and i truly give you my best wishes. i am so sorry that you guys actually had to go through this. but i am glad that you have hope. my deepest regards.


  • FloridaGatorQueen silver member
    November 15, 2008

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    This is an awesome poem. Sounds like you have been through a lot. I enjoyed the read!!! Thank you for entering my contest


  • Carefuldelusion
    November 14, 2008

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    this is so heartfelt and so incredibly sad. I could not bear this with grace. I don't know how i would handle it to tell you the truth. This poem has so many emotions tied into it's words. I lvoe it, Really I do. Thank you for sharing


  • neenz
    November 10, 2008
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    Very moving. Thank you for the entry.

    -N


  • Jade.Butterfly gold member
    November 9, 2008

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    Oh my.. You know i saved this for last now i know why.. This was so amazing and i know this was very hard for you to write..
    So sad and very emontional i shed a few tears over this i myself had twins and my son barely made it he lost oxygen when he was born they had to bring him back and he was under oxygen for 24 hours and i didn't get to see him until the next day.
    My daughter was just fine. Which i went into labor 4 weeks early. and they both weighed 5lbs even.
    They were so very tiny. This poem sung out to me on so many levels like you wouldn't believe. I was so terrified that my son wasn't going to make it. I send you and your wife many blessings and i'll pray for you both. God bless!
    -Mandi


  • peregrin
    November 8, 2008
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    Made me cry... The concept of everything penned out here, made me think of my life, of the last 6 months, and that made me cry.
    This write touches the heart of the one reading it, and I swear, you made it work well. The power that is held in this piece, is amazing.
    Great work, and all the best to you and your family....


  • pop123
    November 7, 2008
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    WOw its written beautifully. Very touching. I'm so happy you entered.Good luck.

  • Writing0Freedom
    November 7, 2008

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    This is beautiful and so sad. It is really touching and your description was amazing. You worded it really beautifully and really got across the emotions and pain in this story. You wrote the this with so much power. I appreciate you being able to share this experience as it takes a lot of strength to be able to do that. You have my utmost respect and admiration for all the trials you went through and the fact that you are still standing together shows how strong the two of you are ! I wish you the best luck and I hope you are able to be parents because it sounds like you will be amazing ones.
    I loved the part about the lullaby - it was heart wracking but so beautiful at the same time.
    Well written! Finalist! Thanks for entering!
    WritingFree


  • Between My Ears
    November 6, 2008

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    Wow. I am amazed by your strenth and your writing. This is beautifully written, your true emotions pour out of it.


  • trekkergirl
    November 6, 2008

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    First off you two have to be the most strong people I know of. I can only say that I grieve with you both. The next thing I want to say is WOW this is one excellent write. I feel the pain as I read each and every passage. I feel the hope. I feel the wonder. I feel the love. I feel it all. This is a wonderful write and I can't say enough about it. Thanks very much for sharing this with us and thanks for entering this wonderful write into my contest.


  • candyinchelsea
    November 4, 2008

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    bless you both

    thank you for sharing such a painful experience,
     i cannot even imagine how hard this was for you to write. i have had to read it several times because it moved me to tears. i had no idea what this contest was going to bring to me. i feel so many different emotions because all of you really opened the doors of your heart to me.
    i send you and your wife many thanks and blessings for the future.
                              Candice


    • scullion
      November 4, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      candice thankyou for your kind comments and thoughts me and my partner will be so happy if we have helped you atall just remember were here if you need to talk xx scullion

1 - 13 of 13