Let me show you the truth,
The secrets that rot away my soul,
And clench my heart
How I dream . . . . .
That the truth will be unlocked,
Released from its cold cell,
To feel the rain trickling on its face,
To feel the suns warmth,
I hope for that day,
The day of acceptance,
The day of happiness,
One day the truth will flow,
Oh, how I dream for that.
A contest entry
- all the prewrites you want (theres a catch) by serenity silvermoon.
400 points, ended January 7, 299 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - A Year. by alexandra..
900 points, ended February 17, 42 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
how could i improve this poem and improve my writing style?
Comments
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I really loved how you open up the poem. Very good poem. It shows your many emotions. I love how you just poured out your feelings.
This was very incredible and lovely. Keep up the good writing. I loved it. Smile.
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What a great job! This is fantastic! I have wondered about "secrets" and the ''truth" and if it is as good as they say... Well from you say here, it sure is! Great job!
Best of luck in this contest!
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'That the truth will be unlocked,
Released from its cold cell,
To feel the rain trickling on its face,
To feel the suns warmth,
i love the way you have personified truth as a being that it would feel rain and warmth and the fact that it would be 'released'
this was a great poem
a joy to read
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