She has everything...
...I tell her
She has nothing left...
...she believes
I stand here and look at the
girl with hollow cheeks and
sad eyes too old for her face
I can't do this anymore,
I'm a whore, slut, bitch,
I'm ugly, fat, and worthless,
...No you're beautiful and thin,
You're not any of those things,
Don't you believe me anymore?
I don't and never did
I still cut and purge
Starve and binge
But you're only hurting yourself
You'll see it soon
But maybe not soon enough
I look at myself
I only see a girl crying and lost
Some demons never leave
Author notes
Since this is very personal please be honest but not too in depth if it's negative thanks
I'm not trying to get attention or sympathy
I'm doing what everyone does here
vent
write
share emotion
share insight
for the contest, rainbows and butterflies
Option 18
A contest entry
- In The Mind... by HereComesTheSun.
550 points, ended November 29, 2008, 12 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - How Do You See Yourself by Velvet Rose Petals.
1050 points, ended October 27, 34 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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Wow that is a rough battle to be fighting within yourself. Seems like you could really need someone to just sit there and understand what is going on with you. Beautiful though. Heartbreaking though.
Rose -
Nice write...
It's true... some demons never leave. You handled this well.
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This is a great write- very personal, deep...
It shows two sides and I love the form.
It could almost be classified as dirty pretty too.
Excellent piece. -
Ironically your own critique serves as a strong footnote to the underlaying themes of self doubt. This is more than words, it's a drawing. In me this evokes the image of the brain, two hemispheres bickering, the final lines the frontal cortex attempting to make sense of it all - and failing. A humans, I assure you, nobody escapes these conversations with ourselves.
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breathing taking in a gorgeous dark pretty write. so much emotion tugging at the readers heart. thank you for entering and good luck.
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i love it! your layout is just terrific, it almost reminded me of gollum from lord of the rings the way he has conversations with himself...very, VERY effective!
"eyes too old for her face"
that line really blew me away
as for it being too "teenagery"...not many teenagers that I know of would be able to express themselves in the sophisticated manner that you have
you should be proud of this excellent expression of self conflict.
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well i love it! i think you did a great job at expressing yourself...I feel like this alot! i think this is an amazing write and you should keep it up!
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I just reread this
And decided to give myself my own critique
maybe i'm going crazy
don't really care though
i reread what i typed
and wow dont really like it
sounds very teenage ish
has no hope
can't really write well
i know i sound emo right now
i havent been like this in a long time
leave me alone
sorry for being
emo and stuff
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