Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

Nocturne For Lady Caroline

Gather twilight in your whimsy skirt
before fireflies spring aloft
to strobe the lawn
and let your eyes shine
before the dew falls on the velvet
of peach blossoms and sweet magnolias,
twin stars to the annunciation of this night.

Author notes

40 words

A contest entry

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

  • ea silver member
    November 3, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I like the touch of whimsy you bring to the skirts here, too, and the fireflies, twin stars of eyes etc. Romantic imagery.


  • AutumnGypsy gold member
    November 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is so beautifully crafted, it flowed from the tongue so well when read aloud. Best to you in the contest


  • just mercedes gold member
    October 31, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I love 'whimsy', and the contrast of the old-world pictured, to 'strobe'. Great vowel rhymes here, and the softness of dew falling and velvet give your poem a gentle, almost mystical resonance. 'annunciation' leaves the reader wondering about what revelation is about to be unveiled, until they realise it is All Hallows Eve, and the dead walk tonight. Great poem.