An ill unease crept cross my soul.
In the dark of a wind swept night.
Shutters creak in a pale moon's glow,
Imagined foot steps fill of fright.
I lie in shivers beneath sheets.
Ears pricked listening to the sounds.
Who knows what lurks and what it seeks?
In dark of night's heart thumping pound.
Thorny arms scratch my window screen,
Like sharp nails digging at my skin.
Winds moan whispering, floorboards creak,
fear of some strange dreaded end.
Oddly vague, those bumps in a night.
Ambiguity's tinge of fright.
by Suseann
Author notes
I'm not sure if my version of ambiguity's meaning of vagueness is what you were looking for. If not,please don't hessitate in removing it. No harm done.
A contest entry
- Illusionary Poetry by Amera.
2000 points, ended November 14, 2008, 12 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Oooo! I could never remove this poem! It's wonderful and that's the whole idea behind the prompt. I wanted originality. Bravo!
Love,
Amera♥
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BEAUTIFUL!!!
Oh boy does this bring back some memories of when I was young and hearing those terrifying bumps in the night!
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I think this creates just the right atmosphere,
especially set against black. You reflect your
title well within and keep the flow easy. Blue
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This is an interesting perspective and I like the way you have moved through the various meanings of the word to create an overall feeling. Good luck in the contest.
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wonderful
Very creative and so well expressed. A terrific write. Best of luck in the contest.
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Wee bit of the fixin'
An ill unease crept cross my soul.8
In the dark of a wind swept night.8(Luv these two)
Shutters creak in a pale moon's glow,8
Imagined foot steps fill me with fright.8
Lie I shivering 'neath the sheets.9/8
Ears pricked listening to the sounds.8
Who knows what lurks and what it seeks?8
In dark of night, thumping hearts pound9/8.
Thin thorny arms, window screens scratch ,9/8
Sharp finger nails, dig at my skin.10/8
Winds moaning whispers, floorboards creak,9/8
I'm dreading some terrible end12/8.
Strangely vague all those bumps in a dark night.9/10
Ambiguous tingles, unnerving fright.12/10
reordering and smoothing makes this a class A poem Go Susie!
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Thank you Ann. I've drawn it more in line with the 8 measured line beat now.
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