the thrum of my tears
pacifies her
like a tacit apology,
puncturing veins
with pity and
possession.
it's heartless;
her blood seeping
through my emotions,
trying to construct chaos
when truths were
overrated.
[she didn't believe,
i wouldn't let her.]
scared, butterfly wrists
slowly crumpled to the floor
as words blacken
the white mind,
leaving her dreamless
so she could spend nights
searching for her pulse
and reasons to
asphyxiate.
i hated her -
unstable breath
and the way I had to
keep her alive;
her closeness only existing
in my mind.
her eyes rolled back,
examining the brain,
as i split memories
down to the roots
where her hair falls
next to mine,
lachrymose and fetal
when I reignite her passion
for life
but it will not be
without me.
her genii and
euthanist, though
nothing's painless
even when you love
to bleed.
Author notes
I did this with the stinky Jeanette!
--
still editing here and there.
let us know what you think though!
--
Credits:
Stanza 1 - Jeanette
Stanza 2 - Chandni
Stanza 3 - Chandni
Stanza 4 - Jeanette [first half], Chandni [second half]
Stanza 5 - Chandni
Stanza 6 - Jeanette
Stanza 7 - Jeanette
Stanza 8 - Chandni
In a list
A contest entry
- Collabs Here by Age of Rain.
1000 points, ended November 8, 2008, 7 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Now you tell me:
Comments
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You work always intrigues me. Such simplicty and gracefullness. Amazing write.
-
the relationship between 'thrum' and 'tears' is really intriguing.
'tacit apology' really gets me as well.
This is superficially emo, but goes SO far beyond that. It is absolutely a superlative write. One of the stronger collabs I have come across on AP. Really well done.

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Yayyy we are so hawt! (well maybe just you
)


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yeah .. maybe just me
Your stinkiness makes us loseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

you do know you're like gorgeous though, right? -
-
psht! don't make me get Gh3tT0 on you
-
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Both of you are amazing.
Simple as. Best of luck in the contest. 
Take care


-
this is one of the most seamless collabs i've ever read.
& i am in love with the painfully bitter taste in the back of my throat right now.
i'm gonna go visit jeanette now, i have to read more & i've already read all yours. hehe.


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hahaha - you won't be disappointed
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I like thrum and tacit, construct chaos
Not sure about "when truths were miscalculated"
scared is a bit redundant
I think pulse on it's own sounds a little odd, a pulse?
her closeness only existing in my mind - uhm nice
her eyes rolled back, examining the brain - haha, ace
That stanza is my favourite
So whos is whos?

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- Changed miscalculated back to what it was befor
- How is scared redundant?
- 'her pulse' ?
- added the credits
you shoulda guessed! -
-
Overrated is better

It's just...a little...unimaginative, compared to the rest of the poem
her pulse works fine
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hm. i like this. it's painful, bitter, aching and sad.
you and jeanette did wonderfully, i think.
helen~









