pots and pans
bang aginst the counter
dishes crash against
the porcelian sink
another dinner
gone cold
like the marriage
remnants of a storm
long past
only the memory
of clouds remain
to remind her of
what was
what might have been
A contest entry
- Storms by Girl With Guitar.
600 points, ended November 16, 2008, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
-
Honestly, I'm not in love with this. It's too simple, you could go a lot more in depth.
BUT, this is pretty much every night at my parents house. It's relate-able, so good work on that. And the "another dinner/gone cold" probably saves this for me. Thank you for the entry
-
-
the problem on AP as I see it. Is that unless you are either writing pornography trying to pass it off as fine writing, or verbose, or you are talking about cutting yourself or severe depression NO ONE likes your work. Ask me if I care? Nope.
-
-
A lot of times yes this is true, but it can't be generalised. Look at the more "famous" poets on here and you'll see that they don't write about cutting or porn. Some might have those things IN their library of works, but it isn't limited to that. That's my view on it.
And also lol if you don't like that about AP, there's other poetry sites out there. I've seen many poets leave this site and join others. It's AP's loss, really.
-
-
-
Oh what a perceptive and creative write... Your imagery is point on... A great take on the prompt.
Bravo...
Ken
Adding your comment:
