my life....unedited

have you ever woken,
with your make-up running down your face?
sheets soking wet from the tears?
blood streaked down your sheets,
arms still bleeding?
wishing you wernt you?
hoping that this is just a nightmare?
wishing to wake in the light of day,
pretty as can be.
with the one you love right beside you?

have you ever cut so deep,
that you didnt kno wether to cry or scream?
hoping that you did not cut to deep,
but inside hoping that you will die?
blood gushing,
the dizziness coming to you.
you fall out in the middle of it all,
but hope that when you wake up,
everything will be alright,
for once in your life

have you ever loved someone so much,
that you would give up your whole life for them?
hoping that they will be yous forever and ever,
untill the end of time?
wishing that life wasnt so short,
and hoping that it will be fair to you for once?
because the other parts of life were hard as can be.
knowing that you deserve more than what you have ever recieved.


i have, ive gone through it all,
you may think your life is tough,
but listen to me.
how would you like to have parents who didnt care?
my dad died  when i was at the age of six,
some people say im lucky,
but im not.
At least you have had the time to enjoy your dad,
so why are you talking like you know?
he may have been a drug addict,
and achoholic,
but he was my dad.
to my mom now dont laugh this isnt funny.
my mom wasnt ever that great,
i love her.
she started out on drugs at my age and has been on them every since,
i think they have killed her inside.
when i was eight years old i got taken away from her.
she was also doped up onm drugs and booze 24/7.
droping me off at peoples houses that i didnt even know.
she got beat up alot because she always picked the wrong guys,
ya they tryed to lay a hand on me.
now she is a little better,
i think that she has straitened up a bit.
she had my little sis named summer nicole,
i named her that, because i thought it fit her bright personality.
anywho, my mom and summers dad dissapeared for about a month,
and left my sis with her grandparents.
well here goes the story like mine,
she got taken away from my mom,
and now she probaly wont ever get her back.
i have lived with my grandparents for 9 years now,
and not once has my mom tryed to get me back...
i wonder if she cares at all.
this is only skimming my life,
just think about it,
you may hate your parents,
but be glad that you have them at all,
because you could be a fucked up kid like me....
just dont take what you have for granted,
it isnt worth it.....