Post-Mortem

Remember me for the times when our lips were pressed together whispering our hearts.
Remember the promise I made, look to the ring on my finger, the one you put there.
You asked me if I was ready and I looked into your crystal eyes and said "Yes."
I will hold your heart in my hands for as long as mine is encased in your chest.
Your blood stains my hands, and it will never wash away, and I have to look down and see your pain forever and ever and ever.
Sometimes I hate looking at myself in the mirror.
I try to hold onto your eyes while mine fill with tears, seeing yours so filled with pain.
I am selfish, and no, I will not pull the trigger on you, on us.
I will continue to shove my heart into your unwanting arms,
And pray that you don't throw it down onto the wilted mattress to later be devoured by the cat.