Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

the part that he left








she goes through life
more holes than woman

kids play peek-a-boo
through her many gaps

 

sparrows build nests

lay and hatch eggs


mothers show and tell
pink lip-glossed girls

 

that's what love can do

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author notes

prompt: take all of me

A contest entry

What did you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments


  • nancy drew
    October 30, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    oh this is just so darn good.

    helen~


  • mysticstorm gold member
    October 30, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    WOW! I love this...how creative and interesting...well done in uniqueness...with wonderful metaphor and imagery...truly beautiful...
    thank you for sharing.
    mystic


  • SageyBaby
    October 30, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    oh my gosh this is a REALLY good piece and you took on the promt really well. wow, it left me breathless, every single line made me imagine something "kids play peek-a-boo
    through her many gaps" what a great line, and mothers show and tell
    pink lip-glossed girls



    that's what love can do

    summarised it perfectly wow! welldone


  • Kiddy
    October 29, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Filled with vivid images and it is a fantabulous write. peek-a-boo takes me back to my childhood days.
    Thanks for the read.
    Love
    Kiddy