Trust values it's bearers... tatters the smitten struck fool who harbors faith in a hopeful dream ridden down to its bolts and leaving only threads sharpened from hollow strikes to the chest where gullible once pounded a tune so raw the rain fell frightened and wide hoping not to seep into cracks made by dances from those in love.
Broken pleasure adores animosity.
A heart for a heart...
Shall I cut up or down?
Comments
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It reads to me like there's a deep breath after the first sentence, like a sigh of relief after having vented, spoken frustrations out loud; then the follow-up thought, then perhaps what options are left, and that final decision. I like it, it's emotional, but not absent of reason nor deep thought. I must say, I wasn't too sure about the last line though - it struck me as a little too blunt, too vulgar in comparison to the rest of the poem's content. The poem might be better served leaving the conclusion implied, or suggested, instead of... taunted. That said though, maybe there's something here I'm not reading. Either way, a well-expressed poem!
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cut down! I love the depth and emotion pouring fourth from this write...
Peace and Love
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Thanks hun!
Missed you. *kisses your pic*
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Uh...! I sigh...!
Such a big sentence, but with great story within...
Good read...
you have given br(e)aks though.
keep writing
Love
kiddy -
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Thanks.
I ran the sentence so long on purpose though.
Sorry...
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I guessed it right... It's good, no doubt...
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