i would murder reason
if only
to force this primal communion
allow me
closer to you
melting into the crevices of your brain
an opiate
made to induce a semblance
of clarity
say the words you want to
(scream them) draw them back in
let every breath
take the feeling deeper
until it penetrates you like a lover
and it matters not
if this exists amorphously in the mind
(two bodies,
scything, scraping)
or in reality
i'll
simply
pass off the hungry spasms of my lips
as the prelude
to a smile
Author notes
Grey
Option 6, primarily; also inspired by the songs Lateralus, Prison Sex, and Sober, by Tool; and also inspired by the word bank.
A contest entry
- FEAST YOUR STARVED EYES UPON THIS by Asabouros..
1000 points, ended October 29, 2008, 10 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
-
this is really really good, the words merge like colours on an artists palate, if this were a painting id hang it on my wall
let every breath
take the feeling deeper
until it penetrates you like a lover
superb poetry i take my hat off to you
-
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-
Okay, first thing's first. (WOOOOOFUCKINGWHOOOOYOUENTEREDMYCONTEST!!!!!!!!! *dances like a keebler elf*)
my favorite part must be the last few lines:
" i'll
simply
pass off the hungry spasms of my lips
as the prelude
to a smile "
though the following comes quite close to being the best
" say the words you want to
(scream them) draw them back in
let every breath
take the feeling deeper
until it penetrates you like a lover "
As do the first few lines
" i would murder reason
if only
to force this primal communion
allow me
closer to you "
Ah, the sweet calmness of you, *kisses the air* love it Wurthermore, Xazzellamental to say the very least.
I just know I'm going to read this a thousand times and a half.
(Prison Sex is my absolute favorite Tool song right now
Woo!)
(yes, 35. I like to pick random outrageous numbers)
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