A cement wall to keep the aliens out
Too deep to dig
So tall they can’t rise above
We’ll push you back down,
There’s no love over here
You say “Build this wall, and keep them out”
I still have my doubts
Are you sure it’s not just to keep us in
Amongst the same skin
All “you people” are blind of this sin
No one can justify this
You try to “preserve your heritage”
Punishing to exile
So you can pretend nothing is wrong
Banished, Separated
No hope to integrate
Displaced, Outcast
Hope, has been put to death
Manifest Destiny has been revived
And again it will thrive
A contest entry
- flesh on fire by Randomly Beautiful.
400 points, ended November 3, 2008, 8 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - great pieces that never got enough recognition by unraveled.
700 points, ended November 9, 2008, 35 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Motivating Change! by WisdomWarrior.
750 points, ended October 11, 7 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - prewrite contest - round 1 by serenity silvermoon.
929 points, ended October 12, 459 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Its a work tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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Interesting flow and I like how you started. I'm not sure I'm seeing a sollution in this piece though as it relates to the contest but as a poem it is very well done. Thank you for your entry.
John -
guess you're not into Glenn Beck!
thougths put together nice
read moves .
suject ; well lets thank God
i'm not giving ponts out here.
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succinct and impressively stated. I think you are light years ahead around here.
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It is sad when a peoples from another country will risk death to cross over into the country of many opportunities. Especially when all they get is a life on the streets, selling drugs and themselves. So are they any better off, depends I guess on what they left behind to live a life as such. Your poem is powerful in that it shows how integration into a new community can drive misery, torment the weak and those without a voice. Yes people are blind to this sin, yet still behind the scenes someone is always set to profit from the misery of others. Great imagery here and a very thought provoking read. Thanks for sharing.
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Hello, Nice poem. Xenophobic feelings prevail in every country these days. I liked your take on the topic. Thanks for sharing and good luck in the contests.
-neha
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Returning the favour from 'Can You Take It All Away?' I never intended it to sound muchb like a song... but if it worked, then awesome.
Loved the title of this write...!
Xenophobia, something incredibly common amongst all races. No matter how in denial we proclaim to be!
I loved how you made each stanza a statement.
'There’s no love over here'
I loved the loose rhyme you used too... making itself clear in the second stanza...
'All “you people” are blind of this sin'
Powerful line!
This should get something... I'm surprised it didn't. I thoroughly enjoyed this write. Too many people are afraid to face the idea of segregation. It's like racism is more taboo than sex.
Brave. -
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Wow, thank you so much, its nice to know that someone appreciates it.
I just wrote something that i was feeling, and i totally agree how this subject is really taboo for some reason.
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Thanks for the entry.
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