In a burnt out building
Where the remains of once an arm
Lay in wasteful minds,
I ask you...
Where do you come from
When you
Do not love one self?
There are a million quirks
To the laws of your body.
Your flesh reveals
That you hold the broken mirror
By the edges just to
See yourself.
Frozen records won't play
In skies where we crush our wishes
And the wishing well.
For example, a hot headed beetle
Will not stalk its own prey,
But instead deny the first,
Deny the first
Or more so, deny me.
We stare softly through the props
In the ocean
And at that time
Love walks in on me
Jerking myself in self loathing
Loneliness on the front porch.
Writing in blue pens as notes are passed
Opposite of the psycho ward
And the boys have the black hole soul,
Black holes; Like the small town shope'
We are faster than a gun's guts
Yet colder than the bare foot.
But no excuse can close the chest
But I, and I, and I, and I...
Baby you walked in
And I Love You!
After close soft pinks
Sinking beneath what was good
And what was soft in me
The hard shell I created
Is gone in the wind that carried it away
And now my love begins to flow
Tearing off this fake skin
Taking out my baby teeth
Mistress that thinks that
Shes not good enough
Now she can
See herself in me
All that is beautiful,
Beautiful in me.
A contest entry
- random by artemis-shinzo.
650 points, ended December 15, 2008, 12 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - My Dreams of Love by Merciful-Manner.
1000 points, ended March 20, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
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Masterful
So amazing you are such a great writer....I loved reading your writes...nice
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very good
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that was so beutiful and i want to cry but some time love isn't a good thing went your beening use like i am...taers.... love your work keep it up
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this is really sweet,,and no doubt whomever you wrote this for is a very lucky person..and you dont try to bring yourself down like most,,you see her and it makes you feel good bout yourself and i think you should treasure tht..you are an amazing poet,,and btw thank you for the comment you gave me..with love..kaytlyn.
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very nice i loved the lines (Baby you walked in
And I Love You!) good luck in the contest
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nice one,, brought feelings I hadn't earlier felt, thanks for sharing
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Excellent!
Very scenic. You have great imagery in this poem.
Well done! -
Why does love have to fly by??? A question ??A nice write...
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This is very eloquent, and the imagry is amazing. I love the emotions expressed, and the word choice is perfect....
I like it! -
Well isn't this something. Gorgeous write, very eloquent and true. I enjoyed reading this, especially the 6th stanza. Well done!
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this is so deep and beautiful, like your girl.
the part about jerking through me off... lol
nice write.
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this is really good hun, omg it more then good it amazing. wow
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this is amazing, it tells an interesting story that makes you want to read on. When I was reading it, it felt as if you were talking, your emotions swirl around your words gracefully! I do agree with everyone else about how well it flows however, "Where do you come from
When you
Do not love one self?"
That part seems a little choppy, other than that very well done! I enjoyed this poem a lot, keep on writing
!
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Woah. This flows very well and kept my attention all the way through. I love every bit of it.
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wonderfully done and just creatively written, it got me that is all i know, keep it flowing.
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It flows very well and I ove the imagery. The only thing that bothers me are the multiple exclamation marks after "and I love you"
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