[falling]

I'm tip-toeing on the tightrope
[don't look down, never look down]
but I don't know if the world actually is more frightening
from up here;

at least I'm free
[temporarily]
from the hatred & the yelling

[still the distant echoes can't help but
follow me & make the air up here
taste stale.]


It's the fine.fine.line between
[someone I hate] & [someone I hate]
It all depends on which way the
stars decide to push me.

In the end it doesn't matter
because it's all the same; it just took
me a while to realize
- took me a while to rip the blindfold off.

& now I'm not as naive as you thought me to be
[even though I almost wish I was]
& your faults are screaming in my face.

I know, I know, it's not your fault
-never.your.fault-
but that doesn't make the wound hurt any less.

Fuck.
I forgot to watch my step & now
I'm plummeting back towards a hell
I never really escaped from.

Your bitter, spiteful words are the last
thing in my ears before my brain
makes a long-awaited collision with the concrete


[& finally I'm free.]

Don't laugh too hard at my funeral.