i'm putting a price tag on my heart
if you want to buy it
let the bidding start
i hear $1 and even 2
i'm gonna gain a profit
from being in love with you.
but the bids are slowly stopping
and all those interested have left
the price is rapidly dropping
and i'm overcome by theft
emptiness begins to invade the space
where once a love had taken place
for once i scream without sound
for once my heart is nowhere to be found.
i'm posting a flyer for a heart gone missing
the words that describe it are
scared and reminiscing
the reward is stated at the bottom of the page
requesting a million as its final wage
a foolish boy returns it for the cash
saying that this heart is trash
but what he didn't know would cause him to regret
this heart held memories that he's forced to forget
now that young boy is a naive grown man
not knowing it was love when it first began
and later he will become the same forgotten tragedy
later he will believe he could make something off of his mistakes
later he will realize
loving someone cannot gain you any prize
later he will know
loving someone is losing someone.
loving someone is losing yourself.
Author notes
50th ish poem on this site. in the middle =]
A contest entry
- Rhyming, are you skillfully indomitable? by Rajia.
650 points, ended October 30, 2008, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Your Choice... by my02U.
550 points, ended November 16, 2008, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Imagination Required! Options! by ShiningNShadows.
725 points, ended December 16, 2008, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Look At How Much I've Grown by xxRainbowDawnxx.
850 points, ended January 4, 56 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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Nice job, but the flow is a little off. Good luck in my contest!
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if you write a poem that starts off rhyming and then stops, it sort of sounds like you lost intrest, like after you made that initial point the rest of the story becomes an unimportant epilogue. but this poem had good ideas, it was an interesting metaphor. i loved it!
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Made me giggle, even if it wasn't meant to be funny. It was wrote with cute metaphors, but you kinda quit rhyming at the end of it. Should of kept up the rhymes, it was flowing good until then. Not a bad job at all.
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