Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

My emancipation of this proclaimation

on edge of my own destiny
having no control of my fate
oh god why have you tested me
giving me cold hard hate

I'm confessing please
these illusions I  create
the sins I must free
you must emancipate

I will serve my deeds
and not procreate
mighty god one who foresees
your holy grace awaits











Author notes

well Guess I got lost again

In a list

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments


  • ajocean silver member
    January 7
    Edit | Reply
    beautiful............


  • hawkeslake gold member
    October 25, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Quick and thought-provoking -- can't imagine what the sins might be, but the use of the three syllable rhymes is quite fun!


  • Kochibo
    October 25, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Hmmm, interesting write. I had to read through it twice, but I like it. "the sins I must free you must emancipate" was a good bit, I think it evoked a nice solid feeling. I don't understand the line "and not procreate". Could you tie it in for me?


    Alicia