I've been a very dirty girl
dancing on this pole
take me home, tie me up
put me under your control
Pretty as a Pornstar
Slutty as a Co-Ed
tease me and make me wet
Let me give you head
My mouth will captivate your flesh
and enliven every nerve
electricity from my lips
will stimulate every curve
The anticipation in your eyes
tells me you're up for the thrill
So leave your drink and write your address
on a hundred dollar bill
What did you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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This is absolutely brilliant.
I can picture this (with the appropriate changes) being sung by Tom Waits as if HE is watching the pole dancer ...
Picture this in his slow gravely voice ...
Pretty as a Porn Star
You've been a very dirty girl
dancing on that pole
I'll take you home, tie you up
put you under my control
Pretty as a Pornstar
Slutty as a Co-Ed
tease me and make me hard
Promise you'll give me head
Your mouth will captivate my flesh
and enliven every nerve
electricity from your lips
will stimulate every curve
The provocation in your eyes
tells me you're up for the thrill
So I'll leave my drink and write my address
on a hundred dollar bill
All I can say is WELL DONE!!!
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Ahh a material girl!
The extra Stanz realy makes this a different peice. nice.
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Compelling imagery - good write
A friend described similar experiences five or so years ago like a trip to Target, Kroger, etc.
Location, location, location. -
that a is picture a guy can sleep to, this poem is sexy with a dark side that just makes it ohhhh so temping, keep it flowing
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donchya just hate those fake bills that look real on the ground, but when picked up and unfolded they are nothing more than religious rhetoric? eh..
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Your words breathe life into the picture!
Excellent imagery and flawless flow of the unforced, rhyming verse.
Love the last line!!
Well Done
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Pro Found...
I am lost.
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