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Indulgence

Missing image

She sighed in mangled radio waves;
hated it when he painted poems
with the light between
shades of the rainbow,

but she indulged them.

Just for a taste of his
rough touch,
for a flick of his tongue,
and for that connection
that made her ache for


just one moment longer.

Author notes

image credit: deviantart.com; owner unknown.

Amaranthine Lover
SilverScent

In a list

A contest entry

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    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments

1 - 13 of 13
  • Bob Fox
    July 3

    Edit | Reply

    Yes

    young love and the aching feeling. strange how your words awaken those wonderful memories. enjoy, live , laugh and love. we get old fast.


  • Nangaleema
    February 25

    Edit | Reply

    "Just for a taste of his
    rough touch"

    i like the idea of this poem - of enduring the ethereal for the visceral. great write. - Mary Jo



  • jinglingjoy
    February 7

    Edit | Reply

    mmmmm

    silverscent

    yummy. very erotic. very good writing. I liked it very much - the spaces and line endings perfectly emphasized exactly right.

    jingle


  • poeticweaver gold member
    December 29, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Congrates on the Bronze!

    A very well inscribed piece here, love the wording, and how each line is filled with imagery. Thanks for sharing, and you this one.

    -Timothy


  • usefuldistraction
    November 23, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Skirting the edges of sensuality very adeptly. You seem to be mindful of the neuances necessary for finding the bulls eye with this genre. Beautifull in its demure nature. Yes, subtle is powerful.


  • amaranthine lover gold member
    November 22, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I really like it, well done!

  • carole21
    November 21, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    nicely done . . good luck in the contest !!

  • Bob Fox
    November 11, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    My

    Lust, such a powerful emotion. I think even more so then love. You have penned a piece that makes me remember.


  • Rhythm Child
    November 3, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    hated it when he painted poems
    with the light between
    shades of the rainbow <<< i thought these lines were particulary well written, you have such a soft skill to your poems
    once again a fantastic write


  • jazzcat gold member
    October 31, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Very tasteful and imaginatively told. I like the images you create and, as usual your word choices really add to the feel of the piece. Nice job.


  • CaliOkie silver member
    October 27, 2008

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    What an excellent way you have with words. Your imagery is so vivid and textured. Yet, there is a simple, elemental quality. Very powerful.

    Careful with revisions, I have seen people revise poetry right out of existence -- feelings are very difficult to revise. The soul is irreducible, but I'm sure you realize that and won't do anything to take away from this one.

    Very well done.

    Garrison


  • Swan song gold member
    October 24, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I think this is excellent! Very well done


  • arafura gold member
    October 24, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Excellent. Very sensual in subtle classy way.

1 - 13 of 13