Once upon a time

Four short months ago I used the blade last,

it was the haunting that came from the utter past.

I had cut so often I no longer felt the pain

so I would cut deeper again and again.

No guilt associated with this heinous act

it was nothing more then my blades and my pact.

To this day the blade thirsts for my blood

but I hide it all in a bottle with in a glove.

I don't know if I will be able to forever hold out

but I know I am going to try, this is without a doubt.

Distract my mind, talk to me,

this is how I beat it daily.

The cravings are so deep and longing

it feels like this blade is belonging.

My flesh burns with instant desire

it feels at times like it is on fire.

Screaming, crying, begging to be held

take this blade and to my skin weld.

The past, the present, the unknown future,

this is what drives me  to need the suture.

In this life there is so many unknowns

it is so much like the weathers many cyclones.

So today I hold on to you,

keep me from cutting is what you do.

Four short months ago I used the blade last

now it is something that seems to be in the past.