At eventide I sit with you
and watch the sunset’s changing hue,
reflecting on the life we share;
no longer doomed to solitaire.
The clock strikes five as if on cue.
At eventide I sit with you
before the fire that warms our toes
as wine’s aromas tease my nose.
In thoughtful mode the hours pass,
Merlot’s legs clinging to etched glass.
At eventide I sit with you,
relaxing with a sip or two.
The hearth highlights your lovely face
foreshadowing night’s soft embrace.
Content in our love’s rendezvous,
at eventide I sit with you.
Author notes
'I sat and mused and drank sweet wine’ (William Butler Yeats)
A Quartern is a sixteen line French form composed of four quatrains. It is similar to the Kyrielle and the Retourne. It has a refrain that is in a different place in each quatrain. The first line of stanza one is the second line of stanza two, third line of stanza three, and fourth line of stanza four. A quatern has eight syllables per line. It does not have to be iambic or follow a set rhyme scheme.
Legs:
the drops of wine that creep down the side of the wine glass. A higher alcohol content means thinner legs flow back into the wine after you swirl the glass.
Nose:
The nose of a wine is made up of its aroma and bouquet, two qualities that are best sensed by smell just after you swirl the wine in your glass.
In a list
A contest entry
- The Coffee House Prompt Challenge: Round 5 by Ceridwens Soul.
1050 points, ended October 26, 2008, 9 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
How do you think I could improve this poem?
Comments
1 - 47 of 47
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Bandits United!!!
You have such patience to write in form! Your words are expressed clearly with deep emotion and thought. Gorgeous rhyme.
Sorry for the late bandit comment, but wanted to come by late or not!
Shari
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Bandits United!!
Bless Your Heart this is one Precious piece and I could not help but smile~ and think how Life is Good~
What a fine form You penned this in also
Bravo!!
Congratulations on Your HM~
-throws confetti-
Woot
Yay~
Thank You for sharing Your Talent
Best wishes in all You do
with love & light~ Desire~*~
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Thank you for your sweet and festive comments on my poem.
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BANDITS UNITED !!
A poem to hold and enjoy... imagining I might be there to sit and rest. You can be proud of this poem, good poet. Admiring this form and thinking I should try it.
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Thank you for reading and commenting on my poem.
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Bandits United!
This is a beautiful poem - I just loved the way that it all flowed together so well and in such an effortless way
the rhyme gave this a light and easy feel - and I just loved every single part!
Polly
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Thank you for your sweet comments on my poem.
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Bandits United
I thought that you used the form effortlessly and I thank you for that. I found it easy to read and even though I just woke up, I could really go for some of what you're having. Cheers
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What could be nicer than a glass of wine, a fire and the one you love? Thank you for your comments on my poem.
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BANDITS UNITED
This is such a soft and loving poem, you have some wonderful descriptions used throughout it. A delight to read on this summer night.
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Thank you for your lovely comments on my poem.
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Bandits United!
Oh, I always love your pieces! This makes such good use of the form by repeating the key part of the image, and then using the rest of the lines to expand upon it. I also love the wine terminology (and thanks for the definitions!). You've created such a tangible and breathing image here, I very much enjoyed reading this!
Well penned!
~lost
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Thank you for your thoughtful comments on my poem. Living on the Central Coast of California I am surrounded by vineyards and have learned a little about wine (and a little about love).
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BANDITS UNITED
A little poetry, a little wine, a little education of the are of wine and a class onthe writting of more poetry, a view of the evening, and all is content
in the world. What are friends for ? A few moments of pleasure , With this I say thank you kindly...mac
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And I thank you kindly for your comments on my poem.
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Bandits United!
This is brilliant! I think this is worthy of Gold. You should definitely enter this in more contests! Your form is perfect, your word choice, content & rhyme sublime. This is filled with imagery & romance. I felt like I was a voyeur.
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I enjoy writing form poetry and I'm happy that you enjoyed this one. Thank you for your comments.
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Bandtis United
I studied these types of poems when I was in English class this last year. And I have to say that I love this piece so much more then most of the ones i read in class. Beautiful flow and rhyming, and the repetition of the line 'At eventide I sit with you' that line is beautiful.
Always write from the heart
Never give up
Kate
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As an English teacher I try to let my students know the joy of reading and writing poetry. I'm glad you enjoyed my poem and thank you for your comment.
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Bandits United!
Gorgeous flow to this piece, with detail to satisfy the poet's palate. You have used the form very well. Lovely!
(@)-->--->--
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Thank you for reading and commenting on my poem.
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Bandits United!
A sophisticated poem that is poetic to read and speaks of love. I liked your choice of imagery and the little details you included. It made me think of a quiet night in. Congratulations on the trophy.
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Sometimes the simpliest subjects are the most enjoyable to explore. Thank you for your comments on my poem.
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BANDITS UNITED!!
Liz,
This is quite a beautifully crafted Quatern, soft and sensual with good flow. Interesting additional information in your Author Notes. Very well done!
Write On!
You have been Spotlighted by your Poetic Bandit Family today because WE CARE!
Brother Dennis 
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I am honored that the Bandits chose to spotlight my poem. I have enjoyed my membership in this group, and I look forward to more activities. Thank you for commenting on my poem.
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Bandits United
Can it get any more lovelier than this? It's the kind of read that makes you feel, really feel- i love the title, even more so because i love Twilight and you've done a great job out of it. Well done
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Thank you for you lovely comments on my poem.
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BANDITS UNITED ! ! !
A charming, cosy magical tete-a-tete at love's
special rendez vous,I can almost taste the wine trouble is it's my early morning cup of tea,Good Stuff
and I don't mean the tea, cheers! ...George...
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I am pleased you enjoyed this gentle mood poem. Thank you for your comments.
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BANDITS UNITED!!!
Ah, I can so relate to your lovely writing. I rember the summer evenings, sitting in front of our house, watching the sun disappear beyond the horizon.
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Some of the best moments of our lives are the quiet ones with someone we love. Thank you for your comments on my poem.
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Bandits United!
This is a very charming poem, filled with magical imagery. I had never heard of this form, but it is lovely. I enjoyed reading this very much, it is filled with romance.
Love & Light
Debbera
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Thank you for you lovely comment.
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BANDITS UNITED
Just beautiful. I could almost feel the relaxed atmosphere and see the the fireglow.
perfect form , lovely rhyme and theme
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Thank you for taking the time to read and comment.
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Bandits United!
I adore Quaterns & I think you have done this flawlessly - there is beauty, and imagery that just sweeps me away
Congrats on the HM
♥
Stay safe
~Manda
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Thank you for reading and commenting on my poem.
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Bandits United!
This isn't a form I've seen before, but your rhyme and flow is absolutely beautiful. A highly enjoyable poem; thankyou so much for sharing, my friend
Maria
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Thank you for your thoughtful comment.
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"as wine’s aromas tease my nose.
Merlot’s legs clinging to etched glass."
I really enjoyed this read. The lines above my favorite accents, add great visual and liveliness to the whole. Love your Authors notes below as well; all new to me and am anxious to learn. Thanks for the added info. Congratulations on your win. I think your piece is excellent.
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Wonderful
Very creative and so well expressed. Congratulations on the honorable mention.
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A great write which has given us a new form to try too. Your refrain line really ties this together well. I have thoroughly enjoyed reading this.
Thank you for sharing
Jem and Ju
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This has a great take on the prompt. The form compliments the nature of the poem. This has good sound to ear aspect. The rhyme hold the stanza together smoothly.
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LOVELY!!!!!
To me nothing could ever be more beautiful and sweet than an evening like this.'s
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Awe.. This is so soft endearing and romantic...
Sigh... Dreamy really....
Love this. Best of luck in the contest.
Delila
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This is just lovely, and I am delighted to learn a new form. Enjoyed your notes as well. The images are so strong and clear, made me feel the "contented" feeling. Good luck in the contest.
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Thank you for your entry, good luck
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