flowing hands and feet
touching every one we meet
no way we could cheat
no need to be discreet
what els do we have to do?
eyes that can not blink
seeing every thing the other thinks
actions would be sync
confirming the human link
what els do we need to see?
full lips that never speak
anger couldn't ever leak
silence wouldn't simply make us weak
we all would be meek
what els should we really say?
ears allowing radio waves
but not as mindless slaves
so feelings of our own we brave
through this the road paves
what els do we need to hear?
lastly hearts that never heal
keeping all the pain real
with wounds that can not seal
we would never forget the way we feel
Author notes
Paul Gauguin quote fits it best.
if this was the case war would never take place, the hole human race would never be miss understood. no one would...
A contest entry
- Imagination by kendhal22.
375 points, ended January 18, 2009, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
what els did i forget?
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Pretty good
I like the flow of the poem. Paul Gaugin is another that I'm starting like. My fav. lines:
"ears allowing radio waves
but not as mindless slaves
so feelings of our own we brave
through this the road paves". Thank you for entering my contest. Kendhal22
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loved all of it, its so true, and your right about if life was this way there would be no war or terrism
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I love the last line, very mind blowing yet subtle at the same time. The only thing i have to say is that to me it feels like the one line stanzas are throwing off the rhythm but that may just be me.
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This is very true, But if we acted the way we should be acting their wouldnt be war in the first place. Then again I dont think anyone knows how to be civil anymore. I really enjoyed the poem, one thing you need to fix though els is spelled "else" you left the e off. Other than that, Its pretty good. I would like to see some capitalization and some punctuation... But anyway, Its a great write!
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thanks a lot, i will get on the problems asap.
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good write, flow read perfection in parts and ive wrote the same kind of stuff. keep it goin
kel
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hmmm, all i can say here is keep it flowing my friend.
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Very nicely done. A lot different from the usual writes. You seem to be straying away from that since you moved and with how things are going with you now.
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you say that with all the poems you comment any more.
not very insightful...
but thanks
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