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In my own universe everything just is
There’s no god of empty spaces
Just lots of places that you’ve never been
‘Something was wrong’
He said
‘It shouldn’t take this long’
He put his head in his hands and moved on
In my own universe everyman and his dog was god
They all took turns to rule
Wise men posed as fools
And everyone just got on
Something was wrong’
He said
‘It shouldn’t take this long’
He put his head in his hands and moved on
It means a lot to me
The land, the sky, the sea,
The sunshine
But that’s the way it seems to be you can’t reverse entropy
And now I’m blue as the sky
‘But there’s nothing wrong, don’t be sad
It was still the best dream we ever had
One day we’ll remember what it was about again'
Author notes
This poem is also a song. To hear it go to:
http://www.reverbnation.com/dumbbaby
http://www.myspace.com/dumbbabyrecords
In a list
What did you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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i dont know how to explain but i really really love this
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how pretty
i actually am finding this deeply philosophical, being that each man and dog is his own god and yet the sky is blue like the world has told us it is? anyways this piece flows beautifully. i really love poetry that inspires!
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That's It!
Honestly, I like the lyrics- also reads like a poem- also reads like some lyrics... Strange, cuz I can't say this about the songs I've heard, but with this one- not too bad.
-Abbs
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Well written, the write flows and kept me intrigueds throughout. Great write
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SSSSSS MMMM OOOO VVVV EEEEEE
Smoov'ly Written yep! me thinks it
would make a good song too.
__________________________________________
And it makes a great Poetical Song !
May be it will make you rich one day
You should try posting it too music
Publishers They can only say one
of two things Yes or No !
If it was one of mine I would
give it a go .
Good Luck !
Eamon .
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Veryu good piece. You really made it feel emotional and real. Great job with the penning! An A+ job with word usage and everything. Keep up the great work! I will be looking forward to reading and commenting on more of your work soon. i hope that you can get the chance to COMMENT back on my work, seeing as how I am sure that you and I take the same amount of love and put it into each and every piece that we write! Thanks so much for the share and again, a brilliant write!
THANKS SO MUCH!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~Heroesrox~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ -
Interesting Aries
We would all love to 'exist' in our very own Universe
I like the 'sound' of your's.We can only try to make
our little place in htis Universe/World as good a
place as we can for ourselves & the ones we live with
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okay.... liked the idea of your own universe and all that... but why state is something wrong and not let us know what it is? Hum.... interesting write. I guess I have to use my imagination on this one. Thanks for sharing this and thanks for entering it into my contest.
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heya
Nothings actually 'wrong' I guess. Thats kind of the thing, the sky is just blue, thats the colour that we see when we look at it, theres nothing we can do to change it.
And sometimes us humans are blue too and we cant change that.
We also cant reverse entropy but thats just a weird preoccupation of mine. It was a song of mine as well so thats why it flows funny.
Thanks for reading anyway.
xx
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