What follows Thursday?

This morning you said the strangest thing ever.
You mentioned that come Friday I would leave you.
Pack my things and fuck off.
I look at you a bit confused.
"It was a nightmare", you say.
"Sure it was a nightmare",  I say.
We cuddle closer.
You rest your head upon my shoulder and drift off to sleep.
I lay in bed listening to you sleeping.
Feeling guilty as sin.
What the fuck, were you reading my thoughts?
I looked at you all confused like, not because I wouldn't leave you,
but because how the fuck could you have known?
I never mentioned those thoughts to you ever.

I love you, I still do, but I've fallen out of love with you.
Or maybe it's out of infatuation, because we were never in love.
I don't know.
I've been puzzling about this for days, weeks, months...
I've run all kinds of scenario's through my mind,
how to tell you that I have to go.
There isn't anybody else, it's just our relationship has run it's course.

I don't get butterflies in my belly when I see you,
my palms no longer sweat either.
I've tried to tell you a million times we need to work at our relationship,
Yet somehow you always seem to turn the conversation and made it about me wanting sex.
It never started that way, but yeah sex was one of the problems.
It always had to be when you were in the mood, and gosh, that was almost never.
I know that when you read this you will blame my sexual appetite on our breakup.
It's never you, you see.
It's not me either, it's both of us.

I know I'm not the person I was when we met,
Not as young, not as lean, not as physically fit.
Maybe, you find me physically repulsive now,
Maybe it's because I cut my hair, I don't know.
Too many questions left unanswered.
I've asked you these questions countless times and you've denied it.

I'm no longer asking questions.
I'm stating how I feel.
You don't make me feel, like you use to.
I've just become a friend, who you share a bed with.
We've long stopped sharing our lives.
We always have been connected, do you remember that?
Maybe some part of you knew this, some part knew, that this was coming.
What follows Thursday?
Friday, when you read these lines, I'd have left already...
...