Back in those days, when the sun battled gray clouds,
Who strangled her beauty,
With their overwhelming grips,
I lay with you, held safely in your strong arms,
Drifting into dreamland,
To words of love from your lips.
Dreamland it turned out to be, in the end,
For you and me.
Every ode of loyalty lay wasted on the beach.
As the turquoise waves, rolled to and fro,
Deep and slow,
I saw you walk away, and set yourself
Forever out of reach.
The Gods reached down with no compassion;
Watching with stony eyes, they broke my heart in two.
I had believed, so carelessly, and trustingly,
In promises, in love, in me and in you
[key change / instrumental build up]
Thunder crashed, and lightening filled the sky
With jagged streaks of light.
Wet, fat drops of rain lashed down cold on my face.
As the wind screamed like a banshee,
They traced the tears of loneliness,
On a single lost soul, set adrift out of sea.
Yeah, yeah, for
Dreamland it turned out to be, in the end,
For you and me.
Every ode of loyalty lay wasted on the beach.
As the turquoise waves, rolled to and fro,
Deep and slow,
I saw you walk away, and set yourself,
Forever out of reach,
[rising] Yeahh, yeahh, forever out of reach.
[falling] Yeahh, yeahh, forever [do a gliss on the 'ever']
out [falling on out, it's drawn out] of reach [a 'turn' on reach]
Author notes
7. “The Winner Takes It All” – ABBA
‘I was in your arms –
Thinking I belonged there’
hope the directions for the singer didn't detract from the song itself too much. I'm going to write this up when I get home!
In a list
A contest entry
- It's Poetry Time! =) Musical Inspiration For You! by KyleBerg.
1225 points, ended October 22, 2008, 16 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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Very much a gold this one
Written with such feelings and I enjoyed the read very much
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thank you patty i'd forgotten i wrote this until i reread it now and thankfully still have the song in mind
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Great descriptions! This is a fantastic song. "Every ode of loyalty lay wasted on the beach..." that's my favorite part, great metaphor. I couldn't have gleaned anything like this from the quote. The musical directions are really cool, as KyleBerg says, it helps you to imagine it's being sung.
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thank you hon
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I actually found the directions to be helpful... made me imagine it being sung (but not by me, of course!
)
Now I'm curious as to what a 'gliss' is. =)
Anyway,
I loved this poem.
I particularly enjoyed the irony of 'dreamland' and the line 'Every ode of loyalty lay wasted on the beach.' Very nice!
One thing I didn't like was the 'banshee'... you have all this lovely imagery of the beach-type setting and I personally don't think it fitted in (just a thought, don't take too much notice)
Besides that, this was all extremely well-written and very emotionally provocative... I felt the pain deeply.
Excellent take on and the quote, great build-up (both in terms of song and poetry), and over-all an amazing piece.
Thank you ever so much for the entry
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the banshee reference was to show the pain
'cause a banshee wails in a high pitched shrieking noise - like somebody keening over death / lost love plus, banshee's are irish [i think ]
Also, a gliss is like, if you put your finger on the bottom of a piano keyboard, and drag it to the top, making that "brrrm" noise as it goes up - that's a basic gliss
sort of used to build music up
sorry im so late replying to all of this!
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