there are whores inside -
contorting their morals around
grippy fingers that reach in -
too deep to scrub off in the shower.
tired lips curl around cigarettes
and pull blue smoke into scorched lungs
that shiver out the paralysis.
I used to be one of the nice girls,
tucked quarters between my thighs
& hid behind the beauty
that everyone told me I had -
now, I finger the insomnia,
yawning legs encasing hipless figures - - -
just to hide inside their skins.
Author notes
red door: brothels once had doors painted red on the outside.
nice girls: a phrase my friend uses to describe girls that he finds attractive, which aren't total sluts. i'm one of them.
i tried... if it's not what you're looking for, feel free to DQ, i'll understand.
color me silent
I chose the addiction option.
i think i might actually like this one guys....
57/100
In a list
A contest entry
- a place between the cocoons and wrinkles. by bird-mad girl.
1750 points, ended November 19, 2008, 15 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - 203;203;203;203;203;203;​​;​;&#& by Jaffa-.
550 points, ended December 22, 2008, 27 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
For a contest
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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I liked this.
I thought that it was very inventive for the option
Well done and good luck.
Thank you for the interesting write. -
OMG i love this!!
my favorite line is,
yawning legs encasing hipless figures - - -
I love the imagery in that!!
just OMG AMAZING!!!
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ditto what Platinum said
I've been nice and I've been bad. being 'naughty' is okay if you can live with yourself in the morning but of course one doesn't usually know that until they try it.
now back to my hot, steamy romance novel
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hahah!! i hope you enjoy that romance novel! and it's not that i was naughty in this case... still... somewhat innocent, haha. but yeah... just a random idea that i liked and ran with.
thanks for hte comment!!
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A really powerful piece.
I like how you created a completely new view on sex. You perfectly captured the loss of innocence and replacing it was the deserpate search for warmth and something more than just bodies but in the end, that's all there is.
There was this hopeless, universal sense to your piece. It was both personal but easy to relate to even if the situation isn't the same.
I like how you didn't use the word violation or any other words to convey that, and I think that made your piece even more haunting.
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