They say among my people
"When Trouble comes to call
he begets three children."
One is doomed in the now
heartache to herself.
One is doomed in tomorrow
slayer of himself.
One is doom, walking.
Child of battles
child of blood
bringer of woes
and ender of life:
he walks the earth
in howling silence
pain his comfort
loss his consolation.
Stay clear of me...
I am Trouble's third child.
Author notes
I don't know...it just came out.
Comments
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What a wonderful example of mythopoeic thought!
How dramatically presented! Ouch, and with my rotten eyesight I got your name wrong! HAAAAAAAAAAAAALP!
Seriously though, this is wonderful. I love the oxymoron "howling silence". Why didn't you choose to punctuate the second two
"couplets" as such:
"One is doomed in the now:
heartache to herself.
One is doomed in tomorrow:
slayer of himself."
After reading the poem through a few times, noticing that you used said punctuation this way once I rather expected it on rereading the earlier verses:
"and ender of life:
he walks the earth"
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Truth is, I didn't really associate those two pairings with that stanza...they associated in my mind only with "One is doom, walking."
Thanks for the new word...mythopoeic thought. I think I like that one.
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Someone else has commented that it has a feeling of myth, which I definitely agree with. A tale whose origins are lost in history, but it has been passed from generation to generation. For me, it's sort of reminiscent of superstition. Or perhaps I've read into it too much. That was the sort of feeling I got when reading it, anyway.
The section starting "Child of battles..." conveys a sense of a troubled anti-hero with malevolent intentions, I think. Although, not wholly evil.
I could be miles off the mark with these thoughts, but I enjoyed reading it. That's the most important thing, as far as I'm concerned!
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"troubled anti-hero"...
That may well fit me better than I've been described before. Mind if I keep it?
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I don't mind at all.
It was inspired by what you wrote, after all.
Hopefully the "malevolent intentions" part is less accurate, though.
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My intentions are hardly ever as malevolent as the outcome of my actions. (Just seems to work out that way, sometimes. [sigh] )
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Maybe some people are just unlucky in that way. No matter how hard they try to do good.
Nevertheless, I think if someone's intentions are honourable they should be saved the projection of a malevolent outcome onto their character. If that makes sense.
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Hi Eric,
This has a real feeling of myth for something that "just came out". Is the quotation real? It's not a concept I've come across before, although I can appreciate the sentiment.
Is "heartach" a different concept from "heartache"? I may be missing an intended effect here, if so I apologise.
Final suggestion, have you considered numbering the children of trouble so that the reference to the third child is more clear?
Trouble is about here too, I'm afraid. And seems to come in threes. -
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Hi, Jo!
Good to see you again! You've been scarce lately...must be a busy life, huh?
"heartach" was just a typo; I usually compose in Word, but this I just posted off the cuff in the window, and no spellcheck to catch it. thanks for your eye; I fixed it.
My Granny used to say that...when trouble comes to call, he begets three children. She's of Irish descent...dunno if it's cultural, but she's "my people" so that's good enough for me. The only other place I've ever run across it, oddly enough, is in a fantasy work by Terry Goodkind, one of his Sword of Truth series. That's what brought it back to mind.
Have I considered...? No...I usually leave these spontaneous things pretty much alone unless the 'urge to perfection' strikes me. For now, no...it's already been used by someone here to stalk me to another site where I posted it, and only brought me more of that trouble.
Always delighted with your comments! Come anytime.
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Busy life indeed, and not currently in a happy way I'm afraid. Currently off work for some personal issues so I've a bit more time for random surfing.
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Now, that's just blown my day. I wanted so badly to believe you were the one-in-a-million who actually got the "happily ever after!" I think you deserve it.
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an interesting piece...reminds me of the four horsemen.
Well written.
Rory
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'They say among my people
"When Trouble comes to call
he begets three children."'
-- Who's 'they'? (And you can't say you don't know).
'One is doomed in the now
heartach to herself.'
--Who's 'her'? """""
I... am not really too sure Eric: Trouble - some sort of parental figure. (I'm guessing Father - 'he begets three children.')
I might just nick this poem off you, Eric. Because I think I deserve it more than you do.
Ok?
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" don't know...it just came out."
My favorite kind of poetry...
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They always said that my mama was trouble, and I am the middle of three children, my younger brother died by suicide, the older one is smoking himself to death. I cant help but relate to this poem...
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Three of my last four writes (prior to this) were concerned with my older brother's recent suicide. There's some of that lingering in this one, yes...
...and maybe I'm smoking my self to death, too...but dang it, why would I wanna live to 90 if I can't even have a smoke when I want one?!
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