Lovely lace layers,
strings of strength
woven with wisdom
by a spindly spider,
presents picture
of perseverance
in hard times.
Delicate designs
created with care,
by a species entrusted
with inbred intelligence,
encompass existence
at its simplest level.
Self-absorbed superior beings
lavished in luxuries,
languish in laziness
creating chaos instead;
webs woven with lies,
garnished with greed,
drape over the denizens
who buckle under the burden.
Universal unease ensues
as systems collapse,
crushing character
as the rubble wraps
the wearied workers.
Survivors of nature’s nourishment
inherit it all,
as the dust settles
and the air breathes again.
Author notes
this is anon - please don't use my name in comments.....thanks
just thoughts I had while watching a spider weave its web....
A contest entry
- Read Between the Lines by Titus.
1600 points, ended November 17, 2008, 9 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
-
well, this one os going to be difficult to judge, in thew space of moments, I've read free verse, and I am liking what I read, and want to attempt it myself. You've certainly made this a characteristic of leisure here, well done
-
-
thank you so much 'Titus' - glad you enjoyed this.
I was watching that spider at the same time I was watching the political mess on tv.......guess all creatures weave webs, huh?
Thank you for the honor of Silver.
best wishes
-
-
I have always found spiders to be very wise and creative creatures. I enjoy them. Am blessed to like them and not be affraid of them so I have learned a lot from watching them. I do hate walking into a web early in the morning and having it wrap around my face though! This is a lovely write! I love the background!!!
Az
-
-
Thank you Az - glad you enjoyed.
I hate walking into webs - ugg...lol
i like to watch some of them - they are fascinating. So dedicated, hard-working, and never giving up in building beautiful webs to attract their prey. Kind of reminds one of some people, doesn't it?.....
-
-
Love the alliteration here hunni! Beautifully done. They are determind critters for sure! Nice comparision, superb read
Not sure about the background tho...don't like them myself..lol. Good luck in the contest
-
-
Thank you LadyD - glad you liked this.
(yeah, i don't really like spiders either...lol....give me the willies, especially if they are big and hairy!........but they are beautiful and very intelligent I think. If their 'world/web' gets destroyed, within 24 hrs. they have another done! and they are beautiful creations - then again, they are a 'trap' for their prey....lol
-
-
Ahh yes, we could learn so much by nature and the other creatures that share this planet!!
Fantastic write hun
-
-
Thank you kiwi - glad you enjoyed.
Yes, we humans could learn so much.
-
-
Hello Stranger.
Hope you have been well. Your metaphoric landscape that you have used is apt, as is the choice of the spider, but your write also suggests more than your willing to let on, but it does show through in some lines. Your writing has improved since last I checked your work, good one. Nice alliteration, and nice use of filler words, hahaha.
My regards.
-
-
Thank you 'Ace..' - glad you enjoyed this.
..Will you quit obsessing about the filler words???.....LOLOLOL......I had to watch so carefully for those filler words when I judged the PO contests - now I can just 'let loose' and use them if I want to!!...
Glad to know you think my writing has improved - that's the 2nd comment I've gotten like that on this; I'm beginning to think my other writes must have been terrible!....
.....lol
Glad you liked this....thanks.
Nice to see you again!
-
-
This is amazing in it's complexity...just like the spider web..Best to you in the contest!
-
-
Thank you Neon - glad you enjoyed.
-
-
Wonderful.... your poetry has improved immensely.. loving the strong alliteration throughout, and it is sad that we as the superior species on this planet cant look after it properly...
-
-
Thank you Rob - glad you enjoyed.
(improved? - are you saying it was bad before?....lolol)
yes, it is sad - we have the inbred intelligence to take care of our planet, but too many let greed stand in the way.
-
-
This is a great piece I love spiders as long as they are far away from me and I don't have to see them lol Good luck in the contest be well
-
-
Thank you Starz - glad you enjoyed.
Yes - I too like spiders - at a distance!! But I am fascinated by their coloring and some of the webs they weave......and also the fact that if you 'destroy' a web, within 24 hrs. they have it rebuilt!
-
-
first of all I know that you said that you faded mr spider there and you did .. but I am seriously going through the creepy crawlies right now.. and darn it I'm typing this as fast as I can.. which btw to let you know isn't fast enough..
now onto your poem I do believe that you are talking about is the superiority of the world of nature, ie the insects... including those ugly creatures called spiders.
we as the human race is supposedly the superior race, but come on what proof is there huh? if we have it we sure don't use it do we.. and when the world ends and the human race no longer exists, what will remain? the insects that's right and the world will begin again. that's what I think you are talking about. now I have been known to be wrong.. and I usually admit it when I am...
that I'm close to being right this time.
Excellent poem and excellent take on the prompt. how did I come up with this you may ask, I read between the lines, and yes when I read a poem I really read it, and I dig deep for the meaning.
good luck in the contest
kat
-
-
Thank you kat - this spider is SO SUBDUED compared to this bg on that green!...lolol
yes, you have some of my thoughts - a lot more in depth than that, but you caught some of the simplistic meaning. Yes, unfortunately, I do believe the insect world will outlive us....survival of the species, and they use their 'inbred' intelligence to survive.....even as they spin those deceptively, beautiful webs to trap their prey.....
Glad you enjoyed.
-
Adding your comment:
1 - 18 of 18
