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Story of her Life

Missing image

Through sunlight on shimmering

tepid blue waters,
antiquated, weary;
the vessel hesitates;
unforgiving is time.
Endless is her

journey

home.

Author notes

JinSays

A contest entry

yes, but what do you think?

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 6 of 6

  • spiritualangel
    November 6, 2008
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    Beautiful. I like it. Best of luck


  • Alyzeh
    October 20, 2008
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    You are so winning this, need I say more?


  • CaliOkie silver member
    October 19, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    What a beautiful and serene poem with that wonderful undercurrent of melancholy. The contrast between these two really sets this one apart -- excellent mix perfectly blended.

    Excellent.

    Garrison


  • Room without doors gold member
    October 18, 2008

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    Outstanding

    I liked how you created a sense of timelessness in this poem, the sailing ship slightly out dated and yet at one with the ocean. You have created a poem that is rich in imagery and also very relaxing to read.Best of luck in the contest.


  • Swangrnv gold member
    October 18, 2008

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    this is really...

    deep..yes so many times i've felt that weariness of the 'journey' that seems to linger on endlessly! great imagery in this write my friend. lots of thoughts conjured in this twenty words write.


  • kiwigirljacks gold member
    October 17, 2008

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    Time is very unforgiving and the journey becomes wearisome at times! such a fantastic write for the pic sis!



1 - 6 of 6