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Enfolding the Soul

My thoughts roam
Through orchestrated dreams
Unbound in a landscape
Formed of tranquil melodies

I walk free across gentle hills
Wander aimless through fields
That rest my mind
In subtle harmonies

I follow a stream to meet the sea
Where the cadence of symphonies
Falls to enfold
My naked soul

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 10 of 10
  • TrippinBTM
    May 8

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    Very nice! I like the contrast between "orchestrated dreams" and "unbound landscapes" as well as the walking free and aimless, but also in harmony. It touches on something hard to talk about, and you did it in a very subtle way. I love me some paradox.


  • Raspy
    May 8

    Edit | Reply

    Awesome

    I love the imagery painted by your choice of words, and constructive skills. "Unbound in a landscape formed of tranquil melodies", Those lines particularly gripped me. Well done. A beautiful write indeed.

  • Raspy
    May 8
    Edit | Reply

    Awesome

    Your imagery took me there. Short,but a very beautiful flowing piece.loved your choice of words too. Nice write.


  • Viyanna Rosemarie silver member
    May 7

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    now i am going to have to go check out the picture you write so beautifully about. thank you for sharing this with me tonight and i am looking forward to reading more from you in the near future. viyanna rosemarie


  • benjamrom
    March 18

    Edit | Reply
    hmmm... interesting... i likes it

    I follow a stream to meet the sea
    Where the cadence of symphonies
    Falls to enfold
    My naked soul


  • just mercedes gold member
    December 16, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Lyrical and lovely, I like the musical references and the imagery.


  • Dragonbabyx3
    December 4, 2008

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    This is beautiful! the rich words are delectable, and the beauty portrayed through the imagery is amazing. Great write!


  • Harlequin Dance
    November 9, 2008

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    I love how this poem flows well, and it combines music and nature together.

    In a landscape
    Of symphony

    It may just be me, but this part sounds awkward. Maybe if you just changed "symphony" to "symphonies" it would be better?

    Also, I noticed that the first and second stanza both have music words that end in an "-ly" sound. If you could manage to work one into the last stanza that would reinforce the image of music throughout the poem

    • lightwing
      November 10, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks for the helpful comments! I've been having trouble with a few lines in this poem so it's great to get some help.


  • delightfulmess silver member
    October 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Stunning. A excellent take on the pic.
    Thank you for entering my contest.


    Delila

1 - 10 of 10