Tipsy from your love...sweet wine
that flows like a mighty river
to its bed...our bodies wrapped as twine.
From your kiss, my lips proceed to quiver.
So into you my dear: my intent to deliver
my devotion: my love: my life.
In perspective to the world, we seem only a sliver.
Unworthy to divert attention from divinity's impending strife.
But when at that moment the sky slit open...as if cut by knife.
And the rain poured down
I turned and gazed back at my wife
As drops turned into puddles...collected on the ground.
Now every time it rains- my troubles get a healing.
I smile... because I know...exactly what she's feeling.
In a list
Do you know what makes you happy?
Comments
1 - 43 of 43
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i almost believe love is like this... somewhere just not in my life lol
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Poems like this makee me want to belive in love sometimes.Sometimes I said.
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<3333333
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I smile... because I know...exactly what she's feeling.
sigh to that
that thoughtful sensibility of her feelings
beautiful Jason
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this was a good outlook on love. you told the story quite beautful. thank you for entering my contest. i love how you wrote this and how you told loves story. thank you again for entering my contest i wish you well.good luck
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Loved it!
showered with imagery and romance, loved the stand alone line
"And the rain poured down" right after "the sky slit open"
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I love this, it is delicate like old lace, it slowed the pace of the day down as I read it....it really is very very beautiful
T
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I really enjoyed reading this
"Now every time it rains- my troubles get a healing"
Love that!
Great!
A~
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OoO i love the ending , Really a magical read well done
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awww....lol adorable! love everything about it!
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Lovely :D
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oh she must love this and you too lol oh it is lovely.
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very sensual poem, has really good imagery
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Rain is extremely pretty...most dont see the beauty in it.
Always love a write about someones one and only.
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This was tiiiiiiiiiight, for real I like this. The ending was fantastic the last two lines were genious
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and the rain poured down...
You've made this sound so lovely.....
Stacy
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this is a masterpiece of romance,its words weave through my heart, you are one gifted poet
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white stone's refrigerator says: "white stone's brain just exploded. There is a rainbow of confetti all over me, the cat, the saddle.... the moxie fountain...
And now he can't comment. Cause he's dead from an overdose of beautiful imagery and raw emotion...
THANKS ALOT! WHAT"S GOING TO HAPPEN TO ME NOW!!?!?!??!!?"
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like it
very nice imagrey. very romantic I like the one line alot. "and the rain poured down" simple and clear by it'self there in the peom. thanks Nic
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aw, this was so sweet...love it very much...great, beautiful job on this ...keep up the good work!
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Nice! First stanza is exquisite!
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wow,
you can really write a good romancey type poem./
this is abosutley astounding.
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My
a sweet and tender write poet. Love is truly in the air. Romance not dead. Thank the gods.
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Beautiful
So Romantic it makes my heart hurt my friend..You have a wonderful way with words..
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Wow! There is enough here for two poems! Great work!
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WOW
you have amazing talent!! the words youve written come together perfectly!! great job!
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I really like the way this flows and presents itself. The imagery is calming. I think it's a breath taking piece of poetry.
Síochán leat
~Mairéad~
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so beautiful to incorporate your wife in this wonderful write. she must be a great woman. i really liked this write. great job.
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Wouldn't change a thing. Imagery is wonderful, emotions are present and very real, and it's composition is flawless. Great write.
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wow, this is a very nice poem ^^ great job.
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I wouldn't change anything at all what a sweet poem!
I don't know what makes me happy but reading this made me think of how much happiness you must feel from your wife and that in itself made me smile I thank her for giving you this write.
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A beautiful love poem! I would LOVE a poem written or words said or a song sang with this much love behind it. A lucky woman, a lucky man. Write on, poet.
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You know what the best thing is...not the beauty of your lines, not the sincerity...both are important...but the best thing is, women love this stuff! Sadly I can't write it...mine comes out like cardboard, like it was intentionally written to be funny...nothing sadder than having the one you love most laughing while she reads lines meant to stir emotion! lol.
These lines:
In perspective to the world, we seem only a sliver.
Unworthy to divert attention from divinity's impending strife.
Those are what grabbed me, set me down, made me pay better attention. For in them, you fast focus on the theme, that the individuals, to themselves, are the focus, are what matters...despite the obvious truth that in the large scheme of things, they are anecdotal at best.
A poem commemorating the intensity of a moment, but of a lifetime too.
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Wow how beautiful.
The love you feel is very apparent in your write.
Love your choice of words especially
Now every time it rains- my troubles get a heeling.
I smile... because I know...exactly what she's feeling.
Tipsy from your love...sweet wine.
lovely write I bet she loves it.
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thats secretly sensual and awe inspiringly amazing well done bruzz
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So absolutely beautiful.... I can't give enough praise.
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Intimate and sensual
This piece is written with an intimate and yet sensual devotion.
I feel your commitment through your words, and it moves me.
Your love for your wife is more than words penned on paper.
Excellent write. I wouldn’t change a thing.
“Now every time it rains- my troubles get a heeling.
I smile... because I know...exactly what she's feeling”
Simply Beautiful...congratulations on your bronze, it is well earned.
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Nice work on this Jason. I congratulate you on the bronze trophy...how nice!!!
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tenderness and love in such a wonderful poem. beautifully written.
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Wow look at that a Bronze shiny... Congratulations!
Anna Lee -
Ah. A shiny Bronze here!
Well done, Poet.
Blessed be.
Myra
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Well this is truly gorgeous! I love the tenderness and affection that floats throughout this piece.
Thank you and good luck.
Katz xx -
From your kiss, my lips proceed to quiver.
So into you my dear: my intent to deliver
my devotion: my love: my life.
I love the first part but this part outstand the rest.
This is written with so much passion
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