Dead

He stole what little I had
I blame myself and him
I said "stop"
He said "come on"
I said "no"
He said "turn around"
He raped me, but was it my fault?
Yes, I never should've dated him
Never should've stayed his friend
Afterwards I blamed myself
Even attempted suicide
I was disgusted in myself
Why couldn't I stop him?
Why didn't I tell?
What do I do?
I tried ignoring it,
Which was only a time being fix
It's been comming back
Kicking me in the ass
I hate him, but I think I hate myself more
I want and need to get away
I need a new life
A fresh start
He ruined me,
Yet he wasn't the first
But I trusted him,
I honestly didn't think that he would hurt me like that
I just want to die
I dont want anyone to know
I want it to have never happened
But it did
Now I just to be dead