You held your head high,
but I cast my eyes
low
When you had no problem looking the world in the eyes,
I ¿couldn’t؟ bring myself
to meet yours
(but oh, how I wanted to)
This dance that we’re d__ancing;
(as we s.wa. a. aaay to the beat)
mm, you’re so *p*e*rfect
so, so perfect, so
it’s hard for me to even allow my(heart)self to
[`imagine;] dream of you
but baby…
I do.
It’s getting harder to breathe,
because all I want is [to breathe in.inhale the acrid saccharine
taste of your. . __look into eyes as blue as the sky, ocean (but not at night),
eyes that belong to]
you.
E Y E S, ey.e.s, yes, it’s always about the eyes,
Eyes I could drown in, eyes I could sing about,
eyes I could write a silly, sweet little [ditty] poem about.
&& oh, yes. Yes, I guess you could say
that I’ve got it
[ bad.
But I always get to wondering if it’s worth it
(after)all. Oh, D O N ` T
give me th a t look. You /know/ what I’m „ talking “ about.
I’m only a hopeless mess
(That wants so badly to prove herself wrong).
Author notes
Awww well I really wanted to try writing another dirty pretty poem. Which would be option four obviously. But... hahaha... since he's on my mind so goddamn much, I guess it's option one, too.
So 1 or 4? Or both?
But then it has more hope in that than most dirty pretty poems, doesn't it? crap. then why do I still like it?
Well my author name is Death by Murder.
Hahaha.
Damnit.
A contest entry
- Options. Points will be added later. by Nicotine Eyes.
300 points, ended November 4, 2008, 32 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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... i really like this!!! i dont think it works as dirty pretty tho. im not very good at dirty pretty either but i have read some amazing writes. i think this works with the other option, and that the random punctuation from the attempted DP takes away from the poem. but i love the poem. good luck in the contest.
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Awww, thanks.
Yeah, I think you may be right.
Well, I'll wait for Nicotine Eyes to comment and if she says the same thing, I'll probably just take out all the punctuation and make it completely the first option.
Thanks so much for the honest input, though. <3
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