im sitting here
staring at the clock
i dont want to let my life pass me by
i want to live to the fullest
i dont want my life to be a memory
i want it to be at the moment
i dont wanna say good bye
i dont want to lose my friends
and family
and how daddy always took me fishing at the park
and how mommy always had those little awsome halloween partys
and how gammy always took me to the doctor and everywhere
and how me and my brothers and sister played man hunt at nighttime outside
great times
i love them all!
and how me and kristen were neighbors and did everything together
not no more though
why i dont know?
but i dont want to forget nothing
i loved it all!
be honest,do u like it?
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Welcome to Allpoetry
Emotionally it's effective and shows that there are all of these memories that you hold that you adore.
Poetically, it is very repetitive which is unnecessary.
"And" over and over isn't necessary.
Eg;
I don't want to lose my
friends and family, or how
daddy would always take
me fishing in the park. Mommy had
those awesome little halloween parties and
gammy always took me to the doctor.
So on and forth.
Capitals and punctuation are effective tools in a piece of poetry.
Welcome to Allpoetry
I hope that you enjoy the site, and if you have any questions please don't hesitate to ask
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another brilliant expression of feelings, dont let the memories go
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no matter what happens in life you'll always have your memories and no one can take that away.
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wow it brings back memories and those memories can last a life time. my advice even tho not asked for KEEP THEM
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thanks i want to keep them!
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