Quick like a band-aid
I tear out my heart
Now it lays beating
On your cutting board
You can carve into it,
Make it be what it needs to be.
Ignore the slowing rate,
I'm sure you won't kill me...
Hold onto me,
Don't let my heart fall apart
Like it did last time your hands touched it.
Never imagined this,
Standing next to you
Wanting every part of you.
I've been smelling you while I was asleep.
Dreaming of you while I was awake.
My mind is infused with you...
It's a little ridiculous,
It's taking over me.
I'm not even sure I want to control it.
This thumping feeling underneath,
Hidden by my shirt...
What is it?
Tell me what you're doing to me?
Author notes
xxxbrittanyxxx
A contest entry
- Take My Breath Away(Anything you Want) by fairytalelovestory.
675 points, ended October 19, 2008, 106 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - i swear i'd burn the city down to show you the light by stylization.
650 points, ended October 25, 2008, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Finding Love [True Love Waits Forever][Awaiting Arrival Of Unborn Child] by stargazer..
400 points, ended April 20, 62 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Sincerely, what do you think?
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Woah. Amazing imagery here, thanks so much, best of luck!
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white boy voodoo! it really works!
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the first lines i could just see the scene playing out.. I've been smelling you while I was asleep.
Dreaming of you while I was awake.
omg lookey who is talented. you better win for this. this is amazing...
Rose -
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Aww thanks. I try to get something good out every once in a while. And I really like how this one turned out, I appreciate the comment. Thanks!
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thank you for entering good luck.
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love it
wow so lovely!! favorite line:
Hold onto me,
Don't let my heart fall apart
Like it did last time your hands touched it.
i love it love it love it!!!
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nice job. good build-up. It really pulls the reader in and makes you more and more anxious for each line.
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