Each day passed waiting in twilight solitude
Watching pretty flowers through his smudged window.
If he is horrid, is it wrong to exclude?
Is his acceptance ever apropos?
He tries to smile but his mouth twists askew;
Deep scars that never healed distort his attempt.
Furtive looks, unspoken messages accrue;
Questions unanswered lead to fear and contempt.
This is nothing new, for years it has been the same -
Horrified glances, before they look away
Why can’t he just hide his ugly face in shame?
Why must their thoughts be marked and in disarray?
A sense of shallow breath held back in disgust
What cruel brute deserves this obscene destiny?
He can walk the same streets as me if he must
But I don’t want him to live beside of me.
Each trip into the bright world lasts forever
Thinking errors were the ancient cause of this.
To live in quarantine is an endeavor,
That holds little potential inner bliss
Author notes
Used all the words in the word bank.
Waiting, twilight, flowers, window, wrong
Smile, scars, never, messages
New, same, away, marked
Breath, back, destiny
Forever, live, holds
A contest entry
- -- Word Bank -- by Noir mariposa...x.
550 points, ended November 1, 2008, 17 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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You have a divine and expansive vocabulary, and this poem speaks and tells a story. I love it, though it makes me sad to think that alot of people do have to suffer harsh ridicule because of their appearance. Lovely job, please keep writing...
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I am glad you enjoyed the poem. I appreciate you reading and commenting. It was somewhat autobiographical.
Mike
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wow, this is like... wow.
I sorta thought of the elephant man as I read through it; that was a sad story.
It is rather sad that some people do have to go through this
Very well done for the choice of subject and use of the word bank ^^
Thank you for entering!
Claire x
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Thank you very much for reading my poem and commenting. I am glad you enjoyed it.
Mike
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An EXCELLENT write for a word bank, very awesome, all the best in the contest
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What Ironic Reality...
This is such a provoking write. Right from the opening lines, my mind lined up my thoughts. I know this much: while it seems to seldom occur to so many of us, this 'horrible, awful, freightful soul' is sometimes a reflection of what's layered deep in us. You penned an excellent telling of a slanted, painful reality. WE see others who are so different from us (sometimes) as if they're 'spooky'; yet, perhaps see ourselves as a 'panacea'... Great imagery and emotional impact...
AsIThink...
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Thank you for reading and commenting. I am glad that you could see what I was trying to say.
Mike -
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Your very welcomed. I liked it a lot. You know, even though the subject matter is kind of 'funny' and disturbing to me (in a 'pathetically funny' way I mean), it was pretty straight-forward. I guess that's why the impact was there for me. No 'layered meanings' and 'heaped on' metaphores here (well, none that I noticed anyway) to unnecessarily bog down the moment.
AsIThink...
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Very nice. i love how it was put together and how it made me think of the people who have to go out in this world and know that people are looking at them and are disgusted by their appearance. and how those people have to deal with it everytime they have to go out when they'd rather live in the shadows. away from horrified glances. i really liked it...made me think which is always a good thing =]
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Sometimes the scars or disfigurement is on the outside sometimes it is hidden on the inside and you just think every one knows. I am glad you enjoyed the poem and appreciate you taking the time to comment.
Mike
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Wow. When I read this I didn't realize it was a word bank challenge, the writing flowed very naturally.
I really like: "A sense of shallow breath held back in disgust
What cruel brute deserves this obscene destiny?
He can walk the same streets as me if he must
But I don’t want him to live beside of me."
Thanks for posting this.
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Thank you very much for reading and commenting. I am glad you enjoyed the poem. I enjoy writing from word banks.
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These word bank contest are very challenging to me.
You have seized the day!
I later thought of inner scares which seemed like an epiphany...I'm a wee off this morning...
but to me that gave it deeper meaning.
Sometimes ya can't hide,
when your crippled inside.
Really nice job....i felt empathy...
how shallow we can all be...
Great job my brother,
LOWELL POE.
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Thank you for reading and commenting. I find most wordbank contests write themselves. This one was a bit harder to write. I appreciate your encouragement on my efforts.
Mike
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