Kisses retreat into their husks,
Sinewed, wrapped in years of dusk
Like a grave, glossy spade and soil;
Limbs that once wrapped ‘round this core,
Their blood it seeps, it cries adored
As droplets form and bowl toward lips:
And the turtles rest, spared mar and toil
Your shovel whispers death thus foiled.
Rock-strewn roads kick sand and mirth,
Wedged in steel and rusted ‘til
The bits seem sewn in wintry grill.
Smirking, chilled out in the snow
A drunkard rums, Olde English sows
The seed implanted in this heart,
Sweet lover mine, we hath doth part.
An angry fog stings toes that furl
Once with passion, now they purl –
The backward stitch that cables time,
Knitting a rib, noosed to mime
The sinewed husks that wrap this neck,
This arm and leg, no cause to peck;
Ordering guilts’ ripe fruit to squeeze -
(Funneled, strained with grains of sand)
Egg timers chime in two soft hands.
Our kids, they rest in bed’s bare stain
Awaiting their noses to drum again.
Author notes
chordphrute
A contest entry
- History Books Forgot about Us (And the Bible Didn't Mention Us.) by They Say Shannon.
600 points, ended November 27, 2008, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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This was a very nice piece.
The metaphors and images were all very lovely, however I didn't get the feel of pure love from it.
I understand the images were supposed to go along with love,
and being connected and such, but it just didn't have that same inspiration.
Nonetheless, the piece was still very good and enjoyable.
Nice job, thanks for entering! -
Completely brilliant
Very well done. The flow to it was nice and the rhyme scheme added to it a lot. Greatly written.
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To me, lover, this has the feel of something immediate, written on the spot; I feel like I am looking at something you are still writing, or have only just put your pen down from composing. The playfulness in this, wrapped around a deeply emotional write, is wonderful. Clashes and clangs like "hath doth", a whole host of strange but vividly colourful juxtapositions of words. Wonderful doesn't do it.
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