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Internally Exposed.

Body weakens.
Soft and bruised.
Fallen apple
Off this tree.

Limbs collapse.
Numb and dead.
Just pieces of
A messy floor.

Organs shine.
Wet and shown.
Turning wheels
In old clocks.



Fate makes life so predictably bloody.


Author notes

Curious LiLi

Option 11; Random Word; Wheels

A contest entry

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Comments


  • Hell In Harmony
    November 2, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Body weakens.
    Soft and bruised.
    Fallen apple
    Off this tree.


    has great rhythm and flow
    most people can't pull that off
    even WITH rhyme


    Organs shine.
    Wet and shown.
    Turning wheels
    In old clocks.



    Fate makes life so predictably bloody.

    love the ending.
    dark- but not cliche.



    goodluck and thanks


  • new born
    October 19, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Good job! Same as Beauteous Beast, I don't really understand this, but I like it a lot. It's haunting and sort of sad. You used the word in an unpredictable way and your imagery was simply amazing. Great job!