Your tongue burns a molten path down my belly
Pooling in my navel making me squirm with anticipation
Down, down further to where I want you to be
Shaven and overly sensitive I moan softly
As you caress my flower with your tongue
Gently searching among the petals for the bud
Slowly circling the bud my moans escalate to cries
And my whole body tenses as heaven and earth collide
Languidly I reach for the center of your being
And guide you to the center of mine
There is a delicious friction to the way we fit together
Our motions are stop and start
As we simultaneously tease each other
Raking my nails down your back
I feel you tremble in oncoming release
Moving against each other in frenetic bursts
You emit a small yell as do I as our passions overflow
Your skin is warm and wet
And I can hear your heart decelerating
As we pull the covers up and drift off to sleep
Author notes
this was truly my 1st time i hope i didnt cross the line. if i did let me know! im ratkos
A contest entry
- Erotic Writers... with a catch by Riftkin.
1650 points, ended October 18, 2008, 8 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - GOT GOLD? Calling all single silvers..... by Paloszoo.
700 points, ended November 13, 2008, 41 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - !!!!*Making Love Intensely*!!!! by ForeverLastingComa.
490 points, ended February 22, 55 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
constructive criticism welcomed and wanted
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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hahahaha, you crossed the line alright, this was a midnight romp and love fest. I thought you were going for an all-nighter, not a sortie, but perhaps next time. lol. Well done.
-
Beautiful, very sensual and erotic, you did a wonderful job with this.
Best wishes in the contest
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Wow, really? This is really good, I wouldn't have thought it was a first. It had an awsome slow and the imagery was just amazing. My Favorite lines were,
"Your tongue burns a molten path down my belly
Pooling in my navel making me squirm with anticipation
Down, down further to where I want you to be
Shaven and overly sensitive I moan softly"
Thank you for entering and good luck
-
Excellent erotic piece! Where's that cold shower?? Thanks for entering my contest. I'm honored to have you share your work here. Good luck!
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Imagery at it's best. Job well done!
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This is something I did not expect
a wonderful poem to make me smile.
Thank you.
Riftkin
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wow this is so good!keep writing, love your work!!
-synnlee -
Wow, this is wonderful!
I loved every line in this one.
Beautiful imagery and a great
erotic you have written here.
Good luck to you with this one!
Jeremy0826 -
Winner,
Never seen you write like this before,
and yes it flowed right through,
and your descriptives...i mean wow
Good luck in the contest
Ken
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im sweating! great imagery! LOVED the continuing steps.
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