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Take, Eat, this is My Body

Turn off the light and look at me
The time is right for you to see
I come tonight on bended knee
I beg of thee, I beg of thee

Caress me with your eyes so clear
Undress my throbbing thoughts of fear
Confess your feelings are sincere
I need you here, I need you here

This is your place beneath these skies
Come now embrace and take your prize
With parted lace and hungry thighs
I plead with sighs, I plead with sighs

I love your flesh against my skin
As fingers mesh and we begin
A love so fresh defies the sin
It burns within, it burns within

With parted lips and whispered praise
I raise my hips to meet your gaze
Your finger tips set me ablaze
In many ways, in many ways

 

 

 

Author notes

Monotetra:
The monotetra is a new poetic form developed by Michael Walker. Each stanza contains four lines in monorhyme. Each line is in tetrameter (four metrical feet) for a total of eight syllables. What makes the monotetra so powerful as a poetic form, is that the last line contains two metrical feet, repeated. It can have as few as one or two stanzas, or as many as desired. I added the internal rhyme to this one.
Stanza Structure:
Line 1: 8 syllables; A1
Line 2: 8 syllables; A2
Line 3: 8 syllables; A3
Line 4: 4 syllables, repeated; A4, A4

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Comments

1 - 32 of 32

  • Barry Hodges
    August 25

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    I liked the way this referenced the Christian prayer mythologies of the so-called "last supper" (or final dinner as I prefer to call it).


  • Cannonsfire
    March 12

    Edit | Reply
    Well the title made me think spiritual and then wow lol, again the repetitious form works well, the beg and the plea felt within the moment. Beautifully done C


  • Ryan79
    November 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Beautiful

    Monotetra. I'm going to have to try one of these. This one is very hot. It makes me blush just reading it. Good job.


  • Swan song gold member
    October 31, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Did if just get hot in here? Wow Muy Calinete!
    pure unabashed desire


  • Cup-a-Joe
    October 30, 2008
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    Amera,

    This is one of the best erotica poem ever written.
    Ill take a dozen copies.
    Joe


  • artis
    October 20, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    wow, never got one of those invitations in the mail, or female

    A monotetra that includes a tantra, and a mantra for sheer bliss. Parted hair and parted ways are all fine and dandy but parted lips are the cat's meow. Then there's the lace, no finer wrap could ever frame the ultimate picture of love unvieled. great write as always~~Artis


  • Sandi Alford gold member
    October 16, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    PERFECTION!

    Oh my, I've not read a Monotetra done so well in ages....Perfect meter and rhyme and your muse blew me away from one thought to the next!

    ..peeking behind your mask to see who the Bronze Dragon inspired with his form, Do I know you ???

    Best wishes! Blessings Sandi


    • Amera gold member
      October 16, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Now that's a comment that would make any poet smile. Thank you so much!


  • NeonRose
    October 14, 2008

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    A very well constructed write, sensual and exciting, and well suited to this form. Thank you for your entry.


  • ZachP gold member
    October 14, 2008

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    There isn't much to say that hasn't been said... this is absopositutely 100% sensual and sex-ay! Well done, love the form.
    Best wishes!


  • UnHoLy-VeNgEaNcE
    October 14, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    love this like i love the poems that are good...wow that didnt mae since..well good write!!!


  • CitrineSunrise silver member
    October 14, 2008

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    I think the monotetra form is very well suited for a love poem such as this. I would like to suggest that you find another word to replace "throbbing" in the third stanza. You have already used it and it sounds like a cliche to repeat it. Thank you for your entry. Peace, Liz

    • Amera gold member
      October 14, 2008
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      Oh thank you! You are so right! I edited it and I’m so glad you picked up on that. Sometimes I don’t see the forest for the trees.


  • PerVirtuous
    October 14, 2008

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    You certainly do master the art of erotica when you choose to. I cannot imagine any man, and I suppose many women, reading this and not wishing it was written in all sincerity to them. The one who does get them is very, very fortunate indeed. The construction of the poem is exceptionally good. The repeating lines work well. A winner.


  • kiwigirljacks gold member
    October 14, 2008

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    Oh... just beautiful and softly sensual sis!!

    I was expecting something religious when I saw the title... glad I got this instead



  • MJ Donnelly gold member
    October 14, 2008

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    Oh my...I just got a chill and goose bumps after reading this sensual gem.

    All the best Amera,
    mj.


  • Pure Thought silver member
    October 14, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    it's late, but this perfect beauty begs for a poetic response. Coming later.


  • Mairi bheag gold member
    October 13, 2008
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    If I were you, Sis, I would avoid mixing "you" and "thee"; but apart from that I love the simplicity of the poem, its directness, and the marriage of sacred and profane. Three bunnies without hesitation.

    • Amera gold member
      October 14, 2008

      Edit | Reply
      Thank you Sis,
      I usually don’t combine “you” and “thee”. I did in this poem and I want it that way. I wanted the contemporary feel but I wanted the feeling of a submissive plea as well. The marriage of the “sacred and profane”? I was hoping for it to not sound profane I was attempting a loving sensuality. I hate pornography and I suppose if someone thinks a submissive lover is profane then I can see your point.

      • Mairi bheag gold member
        October 14, 2008

        Edit | Reply
        You mistake the word "profane" Sis. It doesn't mean pornographic, nor does it necessarily have a harsh meaning; essentially it means the opposite of sacred. However, I have no control over how anyone else reads and interprets my honest comments.

        • Amera gold member
          October 14, 2008
          Edit | Reply
          Agreed; nor do I have control over how anyone else reads and interprets my poetry. You have an advantage, you know me pretty well.


  • grannyeri gold member
    October 13, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    When I read the title, thought this had something to do with taking holy communion in church! WOW, was I ever mistaken! LOL
    Liked this form, very well done. Great images and wonderful rhythm and rhyme you have used in these lines.


    • ZachP gold member
      October 14, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      LOL, GrannyEri ... I thought the same thing, except for seeing the catergories


  • echo-ink
    October 13, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    HOLY HOTNESS,

    Nothing like an evenings snack to bring on the night, YESSA!

    Love ya, Bell, xx


  • Faeryn
    October 13, 2008

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    Wow. Amazingly written. Neat form too. As for the subject of the poem...probably shouldn't have read it. But I like it all the same.
    Love,
    Tay


  • Poetic-Theorem gold member
    October 13, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    both a lovely and sensual piece indeed.
    The form is amazing as well...reads so smoothly.
    Love it!
    wish you the best in the contest

    David


  • Paloszoo gold member
    October 13, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    You are incredible! This is phenomenal. I learn something new with everything you write! Such a hot and sensual read! Good luck in the contest!


  • Girl-Interrupted gold member
    October 13, 2008
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    mmm*

    Really sensual. I began to sweat. The poetic form is beautiful! Bravo!


  • Moonlightdragon gold member
    October 13, 2008

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    Excellent

    Sensual read and an exciting form well suited to the times we live in for it has a contemporary edge .Best of luck in this contest may the powers to be favor your work


  • paulcreates silver member
    October 13, 2008

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    This is beautiful. Just the way I prefer - subtle and sensual.

    Paul

  • Just a poet gold member
    October 13, 2008

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    A truly inspiring offer, and if you ever approach me on bended knee I will do my level best to set you ablaze with my lips and fingertips and anything else you desire!!!

    The poetry is divine, the internal and endline quad rhyming spectacular and the metre is perfect.

    All in all who could ask for better erotic poetry?


  • PassionsPromise gold member
    October 13, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Such a lovely and sensual piece.
    love the form as well.
    great job

    love
    Tory

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