My sweetest gypsy did I fail to shelter you
Once when we two, across the land, beneath the stars
Gave life to freedom, long before this gave us through
and through as beasts in cages; oh, how sorrow scars!
Deny the haunting voices in the castle's air
and leave; I will besiege you when the night enthralls--
Although, I know you're bravest when you're in your prayer;
You've felt no comfort when you heard my ghostly squalls.
And during your sojourn while you were in my home,
I may have stalked the dungeon's depth but for awhile;
From where I would so bittersweetly therein roam,
Oh, all I ever wanted was to touch your smile.
I've sought a passage to cross over willingly,
While nothing where I am could ever share my view;
It's quite disturbing to know that you chillingly
No longer wish to love me 'cause I bear no hue.
So go then sweet; go warn of what deep darkness rants,
But I'll still follow you until at last your kiss
Should tender me yet only when your death then grants
To both our fates: The day we merge as one in bliss.
What did you think?
Comments
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Sorry
K i am going to speek my mind here, I am terribly sorry for this but you diserve a tast of your own medicine,
This stanza,
Well it makes no what so ever umm what's the word, sense to me, and I have an above average I.Q.,
Once when we two, across the land, beneath the stars
Gave life to freedom, long before this gave us through
and through as beasts in cages; oh, how sorrow scars!
so terribly sorry, but i do truly think you should work on this poem -
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No Hard Feelings *smile*
The theme of this piece is supernatural and would be hard for anybody to make sense of as a whole without the art work which inspired it. Unfortunately, I could not accompany it with this poem due to copyright laws. I just want you to know, there are no hard feelings regarding your comment. I thank you for stopping by.
Kaff Kaff
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WAW
That ruled
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There is a lot of potential for something great here, I think... I don't have time right now for a full critique, but I'm pretty sure just from this small sample that you'd love the works of Eusebius. Check out his works!
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