Take me, I’ll die for You.
Please give me rebirth, do what You choose.
I hate the evil that I do;
I die to live, be reformed in You!
[Chorus]
Your will is what matters in my life;
my flesh, this soul struggles, lives in strife.
Dying to ourselves for Your pure works;
fleeing from evil, sin has no perks!
Chorus
Nothing good in and of ourselves,
You alone our only wealth;
we endure, so thankful for Your love.
Your sacrifice, unearned, will lift us all above!
Take me, I’ll die for You.
Please give me rebirth, do what You choose.
I hate the evil that I do;
I die to live, be reformed in You!
Take me, I’ll die for You!
Here is the original version that was later edited by "Kathleen a Nazarene".
Chorus
Take me
Kill me for you
rebirth me
do whatever you choose
I hate myself
for what i do
kill me
and reform me for you
Verse 1
Your will
is what matters
in my life
Flesh and soul clatter
Killing ourself
for your good works
destroying ourselfs
for sin has no perks
Chorus
Take me
Kill me for you
rebirth me
do whatever you choose
I hate myself
for what i do
kill me
and reform me for you
Verse 2
Nothing good
to be gained
but still...
we are pained
we are waiting
to feel your love
which can only come
when we are with you above
Chorus
Take me
Kill me for you
rebirth me
do whatever you choose
I hate myself
for what i do
kill me
and reform me for you
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 40 of 40
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In order to be willing to die for God, we need to die to ourselves. I was baptized a few months ago
and committing COMPLETELY TO MY HEAVENLY FATHER is the best feeling ever. This would make such an amazing song. I love it!!!!!!!!! three clappies for you!
eph 6:10-11
mylee
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After reading both versions of the poem, both give me the same message, if you will. This poem (which, no offense, is definitely a whole lot better with the revisions) reads kind of like someone who is so head over heels in a relationship that it's turned toxic or it could be somebody who is trying to repent and wants to make up for the bad stuff they did before they decided to change. i'm just saying those are two ways it comes across to me. but i do think that this was a good write.
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This is a nice write...
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Guess you wanted
me to see this again! Yes my dear, you honor Father, The Savior & me with your edit! Well done! I would like you to return the favor & get a gander at some of my lyric & poetry that's inspired by Him! -
Very sexy rock song. I can imagine some grungy unwashed load of mental defectives yelling it above a hideous death metal rocking noise.
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Huh?
Would you mind telling me which version of the lyric you're talking about Professor?
I just saw your comment & went 
I can't imagine that at all. The mere thought of it is 
. I need to go take a 
now & rest! 
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The version printed above.....
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mysticalLy Inspiring
I can imagine this as a powerful song sung in my prayer group
This mystically Inspiring song reflects a deep understanding of spiritual healing
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i think it was good but i still think that any sinful parts of you can be reformed as soon as you find that person that you know won't hurt you on purpose just to feel join in your pain. don't give up cuz the world needs more people who have seen darkness and felt pain to live and become stronger every day.
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i love it
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You honored me & Him!
Thanks for letting me know that I was able to capture what you wanted to say to Him! We honor & praise Him with the sacrifice of our lives to live in Him as He requires!
It's nice to see you have a humble & teachable spirit!
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I thought this was interesting
Keep up and please return the favor
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I did not personally like it but what does like have to do with anything
Not something I would willingly re-read a second time, but it definetely had a rawness to it. I didn't feel a rhythm or flow very much, but it wasnt to bad overall.
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I think it's ok, but I don't really like it that much.. sorry.
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To be honest I don't feel like I can honestly tell you what I think of this because it reads more like a song than a poem to me. And I just do poetry. I don't write songs at all. Also, I don't really feel that I understand the poem/song at all. I think it must be really deep and beyond my febble intelligence. However, this I do understand. That you put a lot of work in it. And that a lot of people here in the comment section like it. So I think it must be pretty good.
Good job I say then. -
wow, id love to hear this. Do you ever do any recording?
I can feel it just reading, can only image its strength in song!
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It's pretty emo,which is not normally my cup of tea. However, I really like this. You use really strong, edgy words to say what you want to say, and you use really good restraint in saying a lot with just a few words. Well done. Feel free to come by and comment on any of my poems, I would love it.
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I like this.... I understand that we have to die to ourselves before God can change us... great message.
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i like this and the emotion put into it..great job!
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not bad
there were many occasions where the rhymes seemed forced, and simplistic. don't let rhyming come in the way of your expression!
"Killing ourself
for your good works
destroying ourselfs
for sin has no perks"
here especially it seems like you chose to phrase the last line that way, not because it expresses the idea best, but simply to keep the flow of the rhyme scheme going. I'd say that is the biggest weak link
other than that the imagery is pretty good
good luck, poet
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emotionally strong
Truthfully i don't care for poems/songs like this but i like this.it was emotionally strong,you used strong words like hate,destroy,kill rebirth.those are words are permanent,you can't un do any of these.its pretty obvious that you have talent,i'll be keeping an eye out for your work
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absolutely wonderful!!
i love it. it flows very very well, and it has such a good moral to it. i would encourage you to make it into an actual song. =D wonderful job! God bless!!
~cooper~
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i think that was wonderful but dark and depressing and i dont like that you hate yourself. i hate myself sometimes that is not a good feeling so you have to stop hating yourself over a boy that was never worth your time or effort.
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John 12:25
I refer to the above reference for this comment:
"He who loves his life will lose it, and he who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life."
Jesus said this. Since your request for comments came through a Christian group, I believe you intended this as a Christian/Biblical write.
The quote came to mind as I read your work. I believe the Lord seeks to make us lose our taste for this world, with its curse. That would mean coming to hate that in us that displeases Him, as He is a holy God.
To have a relationship with such a God, one must love what He loves, hate what He hates. So we should hate the sin we're aware of in our lives, and be willing to do what it takes to be more pleasing to Him, because we love a holy God.
That means death to the self that is swayed and tempted by sin. That means hating this life.
As Jesus said, those such persons are ready for the life to come, with Him, in heaven.
I believe that is the best comment I can give you.
This is, by far, the most Biblically correct Christian write I have read here so far. May it be that you have blessed the Lord and His own with this.
I am.
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hmmm....
It was ok. Quite a few spelling errors(ourself and ourselfs where it should have been ourselves.)and your rhymes seem too simple like I knew what the word was gonna be before I read it. The whole emo "I'm killing my self for you" thing just doesn't it for me. rtf. -
this jumped out at me. awesome write
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This has a lot of meaning in it! for me i shows how some many want to to be changed and remade into someone better. This song really touches me! keep up the awesome work. I loved how it flowed and you word choice was perfect. can't wait to read more.
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This is cool. I guess for me, it's always hard to read songs because it's an difficult task to put the words to music in my head, so there's not always a good beat or flow or whatever going on in my mind, but I didn't have such a hard time with these lyrics, and I liked how you wrote this. I like it when people start with the chorus too, like getting "into the action" right away instead of "building up intensity" first.
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Okay I understand people not being keen on the phrase 'kill me', however I know where you're coming from -and your choice of words is very candid in this.
I could see this song is abou the giving up of the flesh, hating the sin-inclined flesh and giving it up to Jesus and the cross. The secret of the new life. -
hood wink by a bandit
I feel it very good I do not like the phrase killing me I do not understand that line. I would change the red color it hard on the older generation eyes. I do not it look like two very two poems not one. It has a religious feel. I think God is about rebirth. Unless you are challenging religions about their beliefs.
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I can feel your religious intents here, but I don't seem to care as much for the kill me. I just don't see things working that way.
I applaud you for doing a song. I speak from experience saying they aren't always easy. -
You asked for comments Here goes!
I applaud you taking on a song, those are often difficult to simply read and often the music helps interpret it with the heart (at least for me!). Hearing the tune would have been helpful... but ah well - such is life!
couple of suggestions:
ourselfs isn't a word...
Your rhyme in the first verse is forced... matter, clatter - the word clatter doesn't make sense in your thought.
in verse 2 - do you really believe we can only feel God's love "when we are with you above"?
I have a feeling that the chorus "take me, kill me for you" reverberates with you, but it kind of leaves me cold.
I hope the suggestions are helpful and not just mean sounding - 'cause I don't mean them that way!
blessings as you continue writing!
anamchara -
It's a good write but it's mostly chorus. I really liked it though. It's different. Nice job. keep up the good work.
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i like this, it speaks to me. I think It would be great with the tune, howeaver. but well written here. please return the favour? p
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This was good, excellent. A deep emotion was spilled out in these words. Wonderful job. I loved it. God Bless!
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wow!!!that's deep. i like it
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fine
I don't get the line 'and reform me for you'... the sense I mean, but else I like it. What does it sound like? I Would be interested to know. Cheers Götz
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thats real good!!
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Sad
I can understand this… I often feel like this
so I sometimes question myself and get lost in thoughts with tears…
Very painful lyrics…
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wow great poem/song good yet sad.. I like it great lines lovley write very powerfull!.
Tash.
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